If you're looking for some kind of official confirmation from Britney Spears about the birth of her new baby son, you're out of luck. However, it looks like the new Britney Spears baby will be called Sutton Pierce Federline – possibly.
That's what reports are suggesting, anyway – Britney Spears and Kevin Federline have apparently settled on naming the baby Sutton Pierce since he'll have the same SP initials as his older brother Sean Preston. Which is all well and good, but if Britney Spears does what we suspect and keeps thwapping out babies like a damp mogwai all the time for the rest of her life, this whole SP-naming thing will start to seem like a tortuous obligation – surely it's a matter of time before an exasperated Britney Spears decides to call a baby of hers Spanner Pikachu Federline because she's literally used up all the other combinations on the rest of her brood.
It could have been worse, we guess; Britney Spears could have named her new baby My Big Fat Mistake Federline instead of the rumoured Sutton Pierce Federline, since that's more or less how Britney Spears referred to him during her lengthy pregnancy. But, anyway, it seems as if the baby name Sutton Pierce was the idea of joke-rapper Kevin Federline, who reportedly decided on Sutton Pierce so that the new baby would share initials with his brother, daredevil driver and proud owner of a fractured skull Sean Preston. Of course, all of this Sutton Pierce talk could be wrong – remember when Britney Spears' first baby was going to be called London – but in a world full of Shiloh Nouvels and Bluebell Madonnas, Sutton Pierce is actually kind of, well, normal.
Not that Britney Spears seems to be in any rush to even confirm her baby's birth, let alone his name. We knew, when Britney's birth was just a rumour, that she'd probably be too tired and busy looking after baby Sutton Pierce to actually confirm anything but – even though the father of Britney Spears has apparently publicly declared that "everything's great," there's still no word from Britney Spears or Kevin Federline. In the meantime, Life Style Extra has discovered that the birth of Sutton Pierce has meant that Britney Spears and Madonna now have more in common than that one dreadful single they did and the embarrassing lesbian kiss that confuses Madonna's daughter so much:
It has been claimed that Britney gave birth in the same room as her hero – Madonna. A source from inside the hospital says the Caesarean section took place in the same VIP suite in which Madonna gave birth to her and her husband Guy Ritchie's son Rocco. The hospital insider also revealed that actresses Jennifer Garner and Kim Basinger delivered their babies in the same suite.
We can't help thinking that the unwillingness of Britney Spears to officially announce the birth of baby Sutton Pierce is a tired ploy to build up some Suri Cruise-style mystique about it. However, Britney is doomed to failure here, since Suri Cruise was the first baby from a man who hadn't produced any children in two previous marriages, is a member of a kooky celebrity religion, had an entire South Park cartoon insinuating that he was gay, and quickly knocked up a starlet after jumping on a couch telling the world how much he loved her even though she was supposed to be a virgin until marriage anyway.
Sutton Pierce Federline, on the other hand, is the product of a shit rapper and a badly-dressed yokel. See the difference?
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Britney Spears' Baby Name – Life Style Extra
[story by Stuart Heritage]
Lacey Noonan says
I LOVE YOU SOOO MUCH bRITNEY SPEARS. You are my Idol. Best wishes.