Here's some news so breaking that we're not sure how true it is – it's being reported that Britney Spears has given birth to her second baby boy with husband turned grossly inept rapper Kevin Federline.
Details on the apparent birth of the second Britney Spears baby are thin on the ground, but here's what we know. Or what we think we know. Or what someone else thinks they know and told everyone else. Look, the National Enquirer reported it – and we all know what a history Britney Spears and the National Enquirer have – but its website is knackered, so here's the Britney Spears news from Celebrity Baby Blog instead:
[The National Enquirer] claim [Britney Spears] gave birth to a 6 lb, 11 oz boy just before 2 am this morning. Their source says, "Kevin Federline took Britney to the hospital in the evening hours of September 11 to prepare for the Cesarean birth." They say her mother and sister were present at the birth.
This is hardly earth-shattering news – Britney Spears does seem to have been pregnant for the last 12 years – but if this news is true, the joy that Kevin Federline and Britney Spears must be feeling at bringing their second baby boy into the world must be matched only by the fear that they'll bugger things up and drive the new baby around like a spaz, trip over with him in their arms and find out he's been dropped on his head. Again.
Tomorrow we'll either have concrete details on the new Britney Spears baby – hopefully including whatever dipshit name they've decided to call it – or a grudging apology if we've ballsed it up.