Usher Gets Booed For Being An Idiot What's the first thing you should do when you play a concert, other than plug stuff in and check your flies? That's right, you work out which town you're playing. The fastest way to alienate any crowd is to go onstage, mistakenly blurt out a greeting meant for another town located more than 250 miles away and get booed by the crowd because you're obviously a dick. Perhaps someone should have pointed this out to Usher before his performance at the Radio 1 Big Weekend festival in Maidstone, where he bounded out onstage and bellowed "Hello Manchester!" to a chorus of boos. Usher should be thankful he got away that lightly. This was Maidstone, after all - he's lucky a pregnant 12-year-old didn't stab him in the eye with a sawn-off bottle of Bacardi Breezer.

Usher Has Baby, Names It Usher

Even though Usher only looks about 12 years old, it's pleasing to know that at least he has a fully-working set of adult male genitals - we know this because nine months ago he used them to get his now-wife pregnant.

And now the pregnancy has come to fruition, because it's been reported that Usher's wife Tameka Foster gave birth to their first baby, a little boy called Usher Raymond V, on Monday night. Luckily the birth of baby Usher seems to have taken place without any major complications, which is a relief because we were worried that it'd be carried out with the same indecision that marked Usher and Tameka's wedding. And no baby wants to spend its first few moments on earth trying to be rammed back up its mother's vagina because nobody can decide if they want it or not. Seriously, could've happened.