Posts tagged as:

drunk

Jarvis Cocker Says The Media Killed Amy Winehouse

by Mof Gimmers

When Amy Winehouse died, everyone was pretty saddened by the news. A young woman, not yet in her thirties, lost and still with a lot more to give. Shame. Of course, it was a fertile period for making lazy jokes about it on twitter, but the less said about that, the better. Anyway, Pulp honcho [...]

0 comments Read more >>>

Boring Robert Pattinson Is Worried His Rubbish Career Will Be Over When Awful Twilight Ends

by Mof Gimmers

Robert Pattinson is crashingly dull. He’s so dull that rain water has been known to hurl itself into furnaces in a bid to escape his terrific tedium. Rumour has it that R-Pattz is so boring that his blood clots into scabs while still in his veins everytime he wakes. Once, it has been said, Robert [...]

0 comments Read more >>>

Matthew Fox Totally Didn’t Punch A Bus Driver On Her Minge

by Mof Gimmers

Matthew Fox has launched a countersuit against a bus driving woman who allegedly assaulted him during an incident in August. Do you remember the story which said Matthew Fox had been punching a woman on the boob and minge? Do you? We told you about it. It’s not our fault you’ve got a memory like [...]

3 comments Read more >>>

Marilyn Manson Drunkenly Claims That He’s A Rock Star – The World Laughs & Continues Not To Buy His Records

by Paul Pencott

Panto season must be upon us, as formerly-relevant perplexing poltroon and peddler of pretend-angst Brian Hugh Warner has once again unveiled his Halloween-night-Lily-Savage alter-ego ‘Marilyn Manson’ in an unsuccessful attempt to outrage/impress anyone who still gives two hoots during a boozy night out in Las Vegas. The vain attempt to appear partially interesting involved Brian [...]

13 comments Read more >>>

Listen To Amy Winehouse’s New Tracks Here (Or Complain About Her Drug Use)

by Mof Gimmers

A couple of new Amy Winehouse tracks have emerged online and on the radio (yes, people still listen to the radio unbelievably) and they are both getting a decent reception from fans. It goes without saying that some people will be complaining about posthumous releases and others will STILL be banging on about her drink [...]

0 comments Read more >>>

Eddie Murphy Has Been Teetotal For 18 Years (Please Start Drinking Again)

by Mof Gimmers

Have you seen how outrageously great Eddie Murphy was back in his SNL days? Think about those fantastic films he made way back when! Beverley Hills Cop(s), Trading Places, Coming To America, 48hrs… not to mention stand-up films like Raw. He was untouchable for a while. And then he went rubbish. Really, really dreadful. In [...]

1 comment Read more >>>

Lindsay Lohan Sex Toys Anyone? The ‘LiLdo?’

by Mof Gimmers

When you need money, you need money, right? We’ve all, at some point, turned our mothers in to become prostitutes when we’ve needed money to buy rolling tobacco and cans of Spesh. However, when you’re a celebrity, you simply turn yourself in. How wonderful that must be. And Lindsay Lohan, fresh off the back of [...]

0 comments Read more >>>

You Won’t Notice Lindsay Lohan’s Crack Teeth When She’s Got Her Baps Out In Playboy

by Mof Gimmers

Boob enthusiasts may want to take note of this article. Y’see, Lindsay Lohan appears to be getting her freckled bangers out in the fresh air while someone photographs them, so we can use them for our own nefarious purposes. That’s right. Provided she doesn’t end up someone’s prison bitch any time soon, LiLo is doing [...]

1 comment Read more >>>

Lindsay Lohan: Corpse Sniffer

by Mof Gimmers

Lindsay Lohan has, once again, been troubling the media outlets with her presence again. Basically, she’s not being fulfilling her court-order and dodging her community service. At the same time, she’s been spotted with little stumpy teeth. That’s right. All her pegs are falling out of her mouth and it’s kinda funny. Even funnier is [...]

0 comments Read more >>>

Whitney Houston Just Wants To Die On A Plane

by Mof Gimmers

You have to hand it to Whitney Houston – she’s really great at being a mental famous person. While you have to acknowledge the power of her lungs, we all know damn well that she’s remembered for (alleged) crack cocaine use, throwing tantrums and being in a lousy relationship with Bobby Brown. Oh, and that [...]

1 comment Read more >>>

← Previous Entries

Next Entries →