This celebrity rehab fad is getting way out of hand - now even actresses who we haven't seen or thought of for over a decade have decided to give it a whirl, too.

Yes, Sean Young, we're looking at you. 

Sean Young - star of several films you're too young to remember - has decided to check herself into rehab after drunkenly heckling winners at this weekend's Directors Guild Of America awards until she was escorted out of the ceremony. That's the spirit.

As Lindsay Lohan knows, the hardest part of being a recovering alcoholic isn't getting sober - it's staying sober long enough to turn down rubbishy films about forgetful strippers.

Or even staying sober at all, for that matter. A video has emerged of Lindsay Lohan swigging from a bottle of champagne at a New Year's Eve party in Italy, even though she pretty much spent almost every waking hour of 2007 in various rehab clinics trying to kick the booze for good. However, the good news is that the video only shows Lindsay Lohan taking one gulp of champagne before putting it down - which either means that a) Lindsay realised what she was jeopardising by drinking and responsibly stopped or b) Lindsay realised that her alcohol-soaked gut had developed an immunity to sparkling wine and put it down to find something more boozy, like vodka or lighter fluid or some of her own urine.

If you want the police to go easy on you after you've been arrested for driving a car drunk, perhaps you should try screaming a hate-filled rant about how rubbish Jewish people are, because it worked for Mel Gibson.

The Los Angeles County Sheriff's Department yesterday released its report into the DUI arrest of Mel Gibson last year, and it turns out that Mel got plenty of special treatment from the police. Apparently police attempted to hide aspects of Mel Gibson's arrest from the public, didn't sign all the necessary paperwork and even gave him a lift back to his car after he was released. Worst of all, Mel Gibson was also ignored by the female police office who he drunkenly bellowed "What are you looking at, Sugartits?" to, when official police procedure required her to curtsy, giggle into her handkerchief and reply "Why thank you kind sir" in the style of a wealthy plantation owner's daughter from 1860s Virginia.

Jonathan Rhys Meyers, the actor that everyone knows as 'him out of Mission: Impossible III; not that one, or that one, or that one, or that one - the other one', is one drunk bastard.

So drunk is Jonathan Rhys Meyers, in fact, that he's got arrested for it after staff at Dublin airport told him that he was too drunk to fly on Sunday and he kicked up a giant drunken stink about it. What's even more embarrassing is that Jonathan Rhys Meyers had previously claimed that he'd given up drinking long ago, although scientists are now claiming that Jonathan Rhys Meyers may have been working off the Irish teetotal model, which still allows you to get shitfaced on booze for up to four days a week.

That last wisecrack was brought to you in association with the Society For Painfully Outmoded National Stereotypes, by the way.