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So, a lot happened while I was on hiatus to pop out a kid: Bruce Jenner became Caitlyn Jenner, the oldest Duggar kid admitted to molesting his sister’s and a family babysitter, Kimye announced they were pregnant with baby number two, and Beyoncé made the all important announcement that she was vegan.
Though these were all big stories I would’ve loved to have reported on (damn baby needing so much of my attention!), none of them were huge shockers. We knew Bruce was going to become a woman, we knew there was definitely something fucked up going on in the Duggar household, we knew Kimye were trying for baby number 2, and we knew Beyoncé was a bit pretentious. Nope, the biggest celebrity shocker of the past month came today when the world found out that John Stamos got a DUI and is therefore not perfect.
So, last night in LA a bunch of people reported a vehicle that was being driven erratically, so the cops looked into it and low and behold, the driver of said vehicle was forever hunk, Uncle Jesse. Since everyone knows that John Stamos is one of the most perfect human beings to ever live, the cops took him to the hospital instead of doing a Breathalyzer because if he was driving like a drunk person it had to be some sort of medical issue because there is NO WAY Uncle Jesse would drive drunk. Not after a drunk driver killed his sister, leaving DJ, Stephanie and Michelle motherless!
Well, apparently his fictional sister’s death taught him ZERO lessons because once at the hospital they realized that Mr. Perfect John Stamos WAS in fact drunk and he was then arrested on the spot and charged with a DUI.
I am so fucking mad at John Stamos right now. You’re a hunky role model, not Paris Hilton! Get your shit together, man! What would Michelle say???
zeroh tollrants says
Well…I would’ve thought his several decades’ long inability to quit his underage p*ssy addiction & basically stalking his ex wife would’ve taken him off the “perfect” list for most people, but what do I know? He’s still gorgeous, tho.