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WEBTHUMP! Hand On The Thump!

by Michael Park

This is the second week of us throwing open the floodgates of the internet to you people. Seen something exciting, interesting, plain weird or even just funny enough to draw a snort of laughter from Christopher Biggins? Well, give Dep Ed Michael a shout and he’ll put them in here and allow people to bask [...]

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Tom Cruise Is Scared Of Singing But Not Of 10,000ft Killer Robots Or Whatever They Have In The New Mission: Impossible

by Michael Park

Professional headcase Tom Cruise has admitted to being terrified of the melodic word with his fear coming to a very public fore while filming his new waste of time “Rock Of Ages”. Tom Cruise is well renowned throughout the world, both as an actor, a producer and as someone who doesn’t know when a franchise [...]

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Westlife Say They’ll Never Get Back Together While We Preemptively Call Them Hypocrites

by Michael Park

Hello. Are you a Westlife fan, troubled by the news that your Princes are going away to enjoy their moneyed-lives with their families and friends? Are you worried that there will suddenly be a void of mawkish, soaring ballads to sooth you while you self-harm in a bath of ice? It’s bad news we’re afraid. [...]

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WEBTHUMP! Thump Up The Volume!

by Michael Park

From now on, Webthump will be a collection of the best things that you, yes you, the readers have found on the internet. Exciting stuff! All you have to do to get your name in lights is tweet the best thing you’ve seen on the internet recently at our scumbag deputy ed Michael (@GreatCollapso). It’s [...]

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Lindsay Lohan Sex Toys Anyone? The ‘LiLdo?’

by Mof Gimmers

When you need money, you need money, right? We’ve all, at some point, turned our mothers in to become prostitutes when we’ve needed money to buy rolling tobacco and cans of Spesh. However, when you’re a celebrity, you simply turn yourself in. How wonderful that must be. And Lindsay Lohan, fresh off the back of [...]

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Hecklerspray’s Top 10 Most Underwhelming “Sexy” Hallowe’en Costumes

by Michael Park

When we make lists, they’re usually pretty easy to do. You just take your own opinion of something, prioritise it and throw it in an article without giving the consequences much thought. As such, we still have people arguing the toss (pun intended) over our ‘Top’ Sci-Fi babes & newscasters. Of course, some lists aren’t [...]

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You Won’t Notice Lindsay Lohan’s Crack Teeth When She’s Got Her Baps Out In Playboy

by Mof Gimmers

Boob enthusiasts may want to take note of this article. Y’see, Lindsay Lohan appears to be getting her freckled bangers out in the fresh air while someone photographs them, so we can use them for our own nefarious purposes. That’s right. Provided she doesn’t end up someone’s prison bitch any time soon, LiLo is doing [...]

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Lindsay Lohan: Corpse Sniffer

by Mof Gimmers

Lindsay Lohan has, once again, been troubling the media outlets with her presence again. Basically, she’s not being fulfilling her court-order and dodging her community service. At the same time, she’s been spotted with little stumpy teeth. That’s right. All her pegs are falling out of her mouth and it’s kinda funny. Even funnier is [...]

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Scarlett Johansson ‘Too Distracting’ For The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo Role (coughleakedpicturescough)

by Mof Gimmers

Hey! Hollywood! Well done! You’ve done well by pointing out that some actresses are much prettier than others. Bless you for that. We really didn’t know who to approach the whole thing and you went and said. Just like that. You just came right out and spoke without a care in the world. Basically, you [...]

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Hollywood Hacker Apologises For Sharing Beautiful Naked Humans With Us

by Mof Gimmers

Isn’t it great to see a superstar in an unguarded moment. They only let us see what they want us to see or generally portray themselves as something other than the real them entirely. Just like everyone, really. However, these people are famous and more attractive and generally nicer to gawp at than Flubbo down [...]

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