There's nothing better than a nice antique leather chair to help you relax after a long day at work.
Well, this theory may be put to the test with the announcement that Nancy Dell?Olio is to pose naked in an upcoming edition of everybody?s favourite spunk-rag, Playboy.
The Strictly Come Dancing star is apparently really eager to show everyone just what Iggy Pop?s chuff would look like if he were a woman.
A source close to Dell?Olio says that, ?She’s willing to show top and bottom in a tasteful way.? Which is kind of horrifying when you think about it, unless you're into that sort of thing.?we're looking at you Wayne Rooney. Don't pretend you haven't wanted this ever since Sven introduced you to his 156-year old wife for the first time.
The deal is worth a reported ?250,000 and hinges upon whether Hef can come up with a suitably ?exotic? location in which to reveal what once lurked under Nancy?s leotard.
So, when your next jazz mag drops through the door in that discrete brown envelope, just be aware that when you open it up you may find the lovely Nancy Dell?Olio, spread-eagle on a beach somewhere, sipping on champagne and winking at you despite her eyes being covered by some obscenely large sunglasses.
For those of you that can't quite picture that, here?s a top hecklerspray tip, shave your scrotum, liberally apply some fake tan (and when we say liberally, we're talking at least 2 bottles), then shove a mirror between your legs and stare at it until you've stopped throwing up.
Thanks Nancy, you've managed to ruin both leather chairs and our own scrotums for us in just under 300 words.