Now we're no professional geneticists, but even we've got a fairly good idea that if Courtney Love ever gave birth to a baby by Pete Doherty, the world would crack in two and we'd all drown in white-hot magma.
So, like most people, we're shutting our eyes as tightly as we can and trying to ignore the stories about Pete Doherty and Courtney Love dating. Apparently Pete Doherty and Courtney Love were spotted 'kissing and cuddling over lunch' in a Wiltshire branch of Wetherspoons. Of course, this is just speculation – we admit we'd probably mistake two homeless tramps overcome with emotion after finally being able to afford a Beer & Burger Special for Pete Doherty and Courtney Love kissing and cuddling over lunch as well – but let's imagine that someone really did spot Pete Doherty and Courtney Love together. Actually, no, let's not imagine that at all, we're getting acid reflux just thinking about it.
Let's play a game. Imagine you're Courtney Love. You used to be married to one of the most famous men in the world, until the agony of his heroin addiction became too much for him and he blew the back of his head off with a shotgun. You then yourself get lost in a spiral of erratic behaviour and chronic drug addiction that you only eventually kick when Mel Gibson steps in to help, for some reason. But still, despite being clean you still give off the air of someone prone to bouts of instability whether you're making up lies about being on American Idol or blaming Steve Coogan for Owen Wilson's suicide attempt. So, with all this in mind, who'd be the very last person you'd want as a boyfriend?
That's right – Pete Doherty. Not because he's the world's most famous self-destructing heroin addict, though – because he'll take you out to Wetherspoons.
Since Pete Doherty split up with Kate Moss a couple of months ago, it seems as if he's had trouble keeping it together. Arrested yet again for a drug offence recently, Pete Doherty somehow managed to escape jail on a legal technicality, only to celebrate by attacking a photographer and threatening to slit her mother's throat. What Pete Doherty needs is the love of a good woman to keep him on the straight and narrow. But obviously all the good women in the world wouldn't touch Pete Doherty with a shitty stick so he's decided to go with Courtney Love instead. Oh, allegedly. The Daily Dish reports:
Rocker Courtney Love is reportedly dating Kate Moss' rocker ex Pete Doherty. The couple was spotted kissing and cuddling over lunch in a Wiltshire, England, pub… A source tells Britain's The Daily Star, "It's too early to say if it could be romance. But these two are both musicians, both self destructive and rather poetic."
Well, they're both self destructive, we'll go as far as that. But, hey, let's drop the cynicism for a moment – Pete Doherty and Courtney Love are both human, and their wealth of shared experiences has probably forged a bond between them deeper that words could ever hope to describe. Plus it's obvious that Courtney Love doesn't just want to wait for Pete Doherty to die so she can sell off his song catalogue and get rich because, well, because they're Pete Doherty songs, and we doubt that Courtney Love is really that desperate for 50p and a second-hand copy of Whizzer And Chips.
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haaa-doou-ken says
lol “50p and a packet of chips”
i really love beautiful music by agonised sould like dallas green and luke pickett.
Pete doherty just sounds like a shatty recording of a pissed bloke in a pub
liz says
Erm.
This story is bullshit. They never met up.
Leslie says
This has been a really bad week for your gag reflex, eh?
H says
This is a load of crap. Adam said so himself, not that you’d know who Adam is.
sophie says
yr all wrong hes a gr8 singer he is a bit of a druggy but so what he has still kept his talented real voice so lay of pete now