Things Britney Spears should learn, part 274 – when judges accuse you of being such a bad parent that you must take random drug tests, it's probably not a great idea to go out dancing on nightclub tables with a sock on your head.
But, hey, that's Britney Spears – if you can't teach her how to put a rudimentary dance routine together, you sure as hell can't teach her that going out partying directly after a judge called her a habitually drunk drug abuser is the fastest way to lose her kids. As more claims emerge about Britney Spears' parenting skills – this time Britney keeps her babies awake until late so they don't wake her in the mornings – it's been reported that Britney Spears hit the clubs of LA for a badly-timed all-night party this week. And it gets worse – Britney Spears was partying with Avril Lavigne. Those poor kids, not only do they have a potentially drug-addict mother and a waster father, but now they have to put up with smelly Auntie Avril lurching about the place too? That's just wrong.
The best thing about Britney Spears at the moment is that there isn't a single aspect of her life free from her prodigious talent for screwing things up. Thanks to Britney Spears turning her MTV VMA performance into an orgy of tranquilised stumbling and dead-eyed hopelessness her career is dangling by a thread, thanks to the Britney Spears/ Kevin Federline custody bitchfight the word has seen how mired in habitual and continuous drug abuse Britney's personal life as become – plus Britney's perfume smells like crap.
If you were in Britney Spears' position right now, what would you do? Postpone plans for that comeback album to concentrate on cleaning up your life and learning how to become a better mother? Throw yourself into work as hard as you can prove to the world that you can still cut it as the planet's premier popstress? Or go out dancing on tables in LA nightclubs with Avril Lavigne and one of your socks on your head like you're the token low self-esteemed attention-seeker out on some sort of screeching special needs hen party? Because you'll never guess which of these options Britney Spears took this week. That's right – Britney threw herself into work as hard as she co… no, wait, that's not right. The sock-headed screeching hen party one. That's the one that Britney Spears did, as People reports:
After a judge ordered random drug tests for Britney Spears, the singer hit the Los Angeles nightclub scene overnight Tuesday with Avril Lavigne. Followed by a pack of paparazzi, Spears first was seen at Winston's in West Hollywood with Lavigne and Spears's friend Alli Sims. The women left around 1 a.m., and Spears was later spotted at Hyde Lounge in West Hollywood until the club closed. "They kept bringing (Spears) shots and so they were drinking," says a Hyde observer. "She was dancing on the tables trying to be really sexy, even putting a black sock over her head as a hat, and putting on a show for everyone."
Ah, the old 'black sock over your head as a hat' trick. There's nothing sexier, apart from possibly beating up a car with an umbrella and then vomiting on a boy, as any man knows. But Britney Spears' nightclub jaunt couldn't have been any more spectacularly badly-timed – tabloids are claiming that Britney Spears has now taken to forcing Sean Preston and Jayden James to stay awake until late at night so they're too tired to wake up and start crying in the mornings. Apparently it takes Kevin Federline three days to stop the kids being upset after Britney Spears has looked after them, although that may just be because it takes infants three days to block out the sound of Popozao being played on a nightmarishly deafening loop all the time.
But, seriously now, what's it going to take to make Britney Spears realise the stupefying level of her own irresponsibility? She's clearly putting the custody of her children in jeopardy by going out so soon after a judge has called her a drug addict and a drunk, but how much worse does it have to get? Remember that Britney Spears has already smeared herself in shit and indulged in public nudity and even tried to kill herself , so that doesn't leave a lot of room for things to actually get worse. Obviously she could get back with Kevin Federline and have more kids with him, but that's a proposition too ghastly for us to even comprehend.
Read more:
Britney Spears Parties After Judge Orders Drug Test – People
Sandro says
Hello
I am Sandro and I am from Spain.
Let me say that you article is just awful!!!
I just do not get why you people enjoy talking bad about Britney, she has problems and the only thing she gets is insults.
I am just horrified by the hypocritical things you people say….I mean can’t you see you live in a world where there are thousand of children who live in horrible situations like poverty in the ghettos or war (and I am sure you do not care about) and now you all seem to care about this two children (who actually live better lives than you and me put togheter) just because you like the sadistic feeling of bashing a person who has had a brilliant carrer giving happiness to thousand of people with her music
Adam Gade says
Hah. Sandro makes no sense. I’m betting there’s more than just 1,000 kids in those situations anyway. And I wouldn’t want to be in Jayden James size 1 shoes for all the world right now, regardless of his “better life than you or me”.
Jodi says
Sandro..I agree!!! The constant insults hurled at Britney can not possibly help if she is either drug addicted or has a mental illness.
Worse is the idea that there was never a problem before Kevin entered her life. Therefore, did he drive her to drink and drugs? Or as I read earlier, that the drug tests given to Brit entering rehab were negative. If that’s the case then K-Fed (Known Partier and drug user) scared her into shaving her head with a claim that his pot smoking would show up in her drug tests because she was in the room. He is older and was a nobody before Brit so he is used to setting up ways to increase his pocket money. If he could make her look more unfit than himself then he had a shot at full custody and therefore 34K per month child support. She has been used badly and maybe did resort to alcohol or even drugs….but he drove her to it.
My suggestion is for Britney to buy a house for the kids and hire a full time nannie (day and night). This is the house the kids should be at regardless of which parent is on duty. The kids don’t move..the parents do. Given this set up Brit should not need to pay K-Fed 17K per month in child support because she would be supplying the house and food and nannie ect. When each parent arrives for child care duty they should have a quick test for drugs and alcohol which they take to prove to the other one that each is straight entering..And again testing when they leave to prove they did not do drugs while with the kids. My bet is Kevin fails first!!
Sandro says
It makes sense
the fact is that people are just really good in bashing and criticize….the world today gats feed by negativity and loves to see someone who is a star being humilated….
I mean how can she live well if she is constantly bothered,just try to think yoursef in the same situation……really try and then tell me how you feel.
She did not hurt anyone…..the one suffering is her, the medias focus just on the bad stuff because that is what it makes money.
Gilbert Wham says
Christ, you people would drive me to drink & drugs if I wasn’t pissed as a little beetle already. Enough with this sententious argle-bargle and circular arguments. You people talk crazy talk! Burn her! Then eat her children!
Carina O'Reilly says
I have matches and tomato ketchup.