by Stuart Heritage
As a newly-resurgent box office force, Mickey Rourke can now use his fame to raise awareness of anything he likes.
So he has. And what good cause has Mickey Rourke chosen to promote? Why, the unnecessary proliferation of dog testicles. Mickey Rourke has taken part in a PETA campaign to urge dog owners to neuter their pets.
Mickey says this is to stop the murder of millions of unwanted puppies each year, but we think differently – we think Mickey Rourke uses mashed-up dog testicles as a facial filler to mask his weird plastic surgery and that he’s on a stockpile drive.
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by Stuart Heritage
Khloe Kardashian would rather go naked than wear fur, but it’s important not to confuse Khloe Kardashian with her sister Kim.
Because, while Khloe Kardashian would rather go naked than wear fur, Kim Kardashian would rather go naked, set up a video camera, roll around on a bed and boff a man whose tongue looks like it’s being remotely-controlled by a man from The Henson Company than wear fun.
But still, nice try. Meanwhile, some dogs have just started an ‘I’d rather be bludgeoned to death for my fur inside an abandoned Chinese warehouse than seeKhloe Kardashian’s arse again’ campaign. Unrelated, we’re sure.
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