Try and hum one of Mariah Carey?s big hits to yourself. In fact, any of her songs. You just can't can you? As multi-millionaire recording artists go, she is utterly forgettable. Christ, we could whistle you at least two tunes by rubbish 90’s popsters Shampoo and they're skint.
Well fear not, because something memorable is finally taking place in Mariah Carey’s Scary Towers. The Los Angeles Department of Children and Family Services are investigating allegations of alcohol and drug use against Carey and Nick Cannon shortly after the birth of their twins.
Do you hear that? ?Shortly after? the birth? They were still in the hospital, glugging Cristal and rolling fat biftas whilst Carey juggled two babies onto her copious fun-bags to fill them with narcotic breast-milk whilst heating-up her crack pipe?