Imagine playing a gig at the behest of Colonel ‘Do You Think He Might Have Had A Butcher Perform The Plastic Surgery On His Face?’ Gaddafi. His sons want a nice party with an internationally successful singer performing in the corner like a circus clown.
“Hi Supreme Thingy Gaddafi! Great place you got here! What a swell country! I barely noticed the pile of corpses I tripped over on the way in here! Haha! No, honestly, what a place! It’s a real honour sir…”
However, bafflingly, there’s a whole bunch of pop stars who have done exactly that. Performed gigs for huge sums of money, which presumably, really grease the throat when you have to swallow any moral leanings you might have about mad bastards running countries with a mixture of fear and Soul Glo hair products.
See, in Libya, certain people have a shit-load of money. And so, being inordinately wealthy, they can summon popstars to come and perform for them like monkeys. Popstars probably mutter about the missing riches thanks to those swine who illegally download their tracks in an attempt to justify playing for Gaddafi.
Truth is, it really is astonishingly easy money. If you can sleep at night that is. Or, of course, you’re toweringly dimwitted and completely unaware of the problems in the world.
And so, stepping up to the mound is the most unlikely of people.
Nelly Furtado is giving back the $1million fee she received four years ago after she pranced around at a private gig for the Gaddafi family.
Furtado says:
“In 2007, I received 1million$ from the Qaddafi clan to perform a 45 min. Show for guests at a hotel in Italy.”
“I am going to donate the $.”
Hardly eloquent, but she was using the 140 character limit of twitter. The fact remains though, that Furtado – a singer who may well not be able to afford to give away such a big sum of money (face it, she isn’t an enormo superstar is she?) – is showing a rare bit of decent moral judgement here, leaving other popstars looking nervously at their bank balances and thinking ‘Jeez! Do we have to do that too? I really like the house in the country I just bought and the fleet of motor cycles I just bought aren’t going to pay for themselves!’
Mariah Carey, Beyonc? and Usher are all people who have performed for the Gaddafi family. They’re gonna look pretty heartless if they just sit on their expensively oiled hands, whistling to themselves and generally trying to ignore all those people who are constantly staring and them.
Juventus Football Club and FIAT will no doubt be hoping that no-one starts asking them about the amount of money Gaddafi has invested into them too.
Sorry, what? We’re supposed to do some jokes?
Okay. Do you think Prince Harry will be attending Wills’ stag-do dressed as Gaddafi while blacked-up? He probably will won’t he? That’s because he’s a hilarious shit-fer-brains.
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pablo says
It’s good that she’s not keeping the money, but it doesn’t change the fact that she performed for the curly headed “bo selecta character resembling” pig.