Articles tagged with: Jordan
WEBTHUMP! Wednesday 19 November 2008
10 - If this week hasn't destroyed your soul enough yet, this should probably do the trick... 9 - Jordan: "Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah" - Popsugar 8 - Hugh Jackman, please be our goonfaced king. Please - Best Week Ever 7 - Re-release this now before The Dark Knight comes ...
WEBTHUMP! Friday September 26 2008
10 - Convinced we write nothing but crap on a daily basis? Contribute to the world's biggest story and prove you can string a sentence together - The Forever Story 9 - Heartbroken when you found out the tooth fairy was just a cruel creation? Well fear not, it looks like one might exist. Complete with excess anger - Metro 8 - Ever wanted ...
WEBTHUMP! Thursday September 25 2008
10 - Ah ha ha hahaha ha. She said "penises" 9 - What happened to the island on Lost? Man doesn't know, but pretends he does - EW 8 - Some commuters, whining - I Am Bored 7 - Bagel-fuls. Possibly not food in the technical sense, but still partially delicious non-food - ...
Katie Price Maintains Her Classy, Unblemished Image
When Americans think of 'classiness', they pretty much think of Britain's beloved Royal family. Granted they don't actually do much apart from shoot peasants, laugh at the poor and eat huge slices of swan pie stuffed with £50 notes, but that doesn't matter. Sadly the illusion that the general British public speak like the Queen are usually shattered. Enter a typical London market place and instead of hearing "would you like some apples?" you'll get "Eearrrrrrrrrrrrrr youuuuuuuu. Wanna buy sommmmmmme aaaaapples to gooooooo wiv da stairs?" Tourists will also be shocked by the amount of people pissing in the street, vomiting into hats and having sex in cars. Just ask Katie Price and her schizophrenic alter-ego Jordan how it feels. It happened to her the other day with her plasticine lover Peter Andre.
When Americans think of 'classiness', they pretty much think of Britain's beloved Royal family. Granted they don't actually do much apart from shoot peasants, laugh at the poor and eat huge slices of swan pie stuffed with £50 notes, but that doesn't matter. Sadly the illusion that the general British public speak like the Queen are usually shattered. Enter a typical London market place and instead of hearing "would you like some apples?" you'll get "Eearrrrrrrrrrrrrr youuuuuuuu. Wanna buy sommmmmmme aaaaapples to gooooooo wiv da stairs?" Tourists will also be shocked by the amount of people pissing in the street, vomiting into hats and having sex in cars. Just ask Katie Price and her schizophrenic alter-ego Jordan how it feels. It happened to her the other day with her plasticine lover Peter Andre.
Jordan Wants To Olympic-Compete With Horses
Jordan has kindly agreed to bring home an equestrian gold medal for Britain from a nonspecific future Olympic game, but only on two conditions: 1) She has to be able to use the horse her husband just got her, and 2) The horse has to be a female with silicone implanted all along its nipple-line to make it beautiful like her. The horse is a male now, but several veterinarians have assured us if the steed gets sex changed now it'll still have plenty of time to make a recovery before anyone has to put it's name on a roster down in ol' Beijing. If those two requirements are met, assuming they are not 100% fabricated, it pretty much guarantees England a horse-related gold medal for the first time since Prince Harry accidentally won one when he was seen by judges trotting around the high-jump parking lot in Athens four years ago. By the way, Jordan, a woman famous for something or other, seriously did mention competing in the Olympics with the horse her husband just got her. Now if she could just finish coordinating the horse's natural jumping ability with that of the pole vault they'd really sport a chance.
Jordan has kindly agreed to bring home an equestrian gold medal for Britain from a nonspecific future Olympic game, but only on two conditions: 1) She has to be able to use the horse her husband just got her, and 2) The horse has to be a female with silicone implanted all along its nipple-line to make it beautiful like her. The horse is a male now, but several veterinarians have assured us if the steed gets sex changed now it'll still have plenty of time to make a recovery before anyone has to put it's name on a roster down in ol' Beijing. If those two requirements are met, assuming they are not 100% fabricated, it pretty much guarantees England a horse-related gold medal for the first time since Prince Harry accidentally won one when he was seen by judges trotting around the high-jump parking lot in Athens four years ago. By the way, Jordan, a woman famous for something or other, seriously did mention competing in the Olympics with the horse her husband just got her. Now if she could just finish coordinating the horse's natural jumping ability with that of the pole vault they'd really sport a chance.
Jordan’s Boob Ops Have Butchered Her Breasts
FROM DIETPIXIE - Pictures have emerged this weekend of Katie Price, aka Jordan, which show the damage that she has inflicted on her boobs after numerous operations. Jordan, 29, has undergone four breast enlargement and reduction operations in the past ten years. This surgery, combined with giving birth to her three kids, has left her ...
FROM DIETPIXIE - Pictures have emerged this weekend of Katie Price, aka Jordan, which show the damage that she has inflicted on her boobs after numerous operations. Jordan, 29, has undergone four breast enlargement and reduction operations in the past ten years. This surgery, combined with giving birth to her three kids, has left her ...
Peter Andre Warns Stick-Thin Jordan To Start Eating
From DIETPIXIE - Britain’s most famous pair of tits, Jordan and Peter Andre (see what we did there?) are squabbling between themselves again - and this time it’s not over their sex life or plastic surgery obsession, but food. I don’t know about you, but reading about these celebs makes me feel so boring and ...
From DIETPIXIE - Britain’s most famous pair of tits, Jordan and Peter Andre (see what we did there?) are squabbling between themselves again - and this time it’s not over their sex life or plastic surgery obsession, but food. I don’t know about you, but reading about these celebs makes me feel so boring and ...
Katie Price Set To Ruin A Hollywood Remake
Katie Price, who’s that? The short answer is the fake-tanned slapper who’s famous for getting her tits out.
However, there is another solution to the question. You see, Katie Price has two names. We’d like to point out that she’s not schizophrenic and doesn’t pick between Jordan and Kate Price depending on if its warm enough to strap on a bikini.
In the early days (aka - the nineties) when she had the body for it, Jordon would get her boobies out for men’s magazines across the land. But they weren’t just any set of knockers. They were mega melons! As big as your head and the weight of seven small puppies.
Then Jordan grew up. Married a dire popstar and wanted people to call her by her real name to be taken more seriously. This approach has landed her a film role. And no, it’s not porn related!
