Posts tagged as:

conspiracy

Michael Jackson Jokes Banned On Janet Jackson’s Tour, Freedom Of Speech In Turmoil

by Matthew Laidlow

Towards the end of his dog-eared career, Michael Jackson began to resemble an eerie looking clown who’s wax face was tarnishing in a mild midday heat. See, we can say that because that’s our opinion. But if you go to a concert by not-so-important Jackson sibling Janet, that right will be taken from you. Due [...]

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Michael Jackson Fans Now Thoroughly Bored Of Conrad Murray Trial

by Mof Gimmers

The trial of Michael Jackson’s personal physician – ‘Sexy’ Dr Conrad Murray – will enter a new phase this week: The thoroughly tedious, no-one cares anymore phase. There are rumours which suggest that even Jackson’s own family are beyond caring. The doctor’s attorneys trying to counter three weeks of testimony, attempting to show that Jacko [...]

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Michael Jackson: “A Bit Of An Alien”

by Mof Gimmers

Michael Jackson looked funny. It doesn’t matter if you love his music or happen to be a blinkered, crazed fan – there’s no hiding from the fact that his face was downright odd. So odd, it could curdle water. Ever seen anyone else with a nose like his? No. La Toya Jackson does not count [...]

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Conrad Murray Points At Dr Klein And Winks At The Jury In Michael Jackson Manslaughter Gubbins

by Mof Gimmers

Dr Conrad Murray is more than just a doctor. If the Michael Jackson manslaughter trail has taught us anything, it’s that Murray is quite the swordsman, with a troupe of dancing mistresses being paraded before the world. He should be pleased AND point out that they were all of legal and consenting age. Which brings [...]

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Black Eyed Peas Now Running Away From Michael Jackson Tribute As Fast As Their Little Legs Will Go

by Mof Gimmers

Haw, poor Michael Forever. The beleaguered tribute show to Michael Jackson is about as useful as a teapot made from Rizla. Basically, half the family hate it, the other half performing at it, joined by a cast of also-rans and nobodies. And now, someone you will have heard of – the Black Eyed Peas – [...]

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Michael Jackson Set To Release The Ironically Titled “Immortal” Album

by Matthew Laidlow

They are lots of words to describe Michael Jackson. Depending on your relationship with him, then your opinion will certainly differ. Joe Jackson loved Michael with all his heart and whipping belt due to the money he raked in and owners of tacky shops loved his credit card. Fans who met Michael were touched in [...]

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Michael Jackson Trial: Now Starring The Incredible Hulk, A Mistress And Proof Of Murder

by Mof Gimmers

Even in death, Michael Jackson’s attracts a carnival of freaks and oddballs, all wanting to chirrup about how wonderful/damaged/dead the former King Of Pop is. And this week, things have gotten really super. How super? The Incredible Hulk super, that’s how much! For some reason, former Hulk Lou Ferrigno is getting involved in the Moonwalking [...]

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Julian Assange’s Penis Is Of No Interest To Anyone

by Kris Silver

Wikileaks founder Julian Assange probably knows all of your deepest and darkest secrets, but it seems like no one wants to know any of his as his new unauthorised autobiography has failed to set the literary world alight. Since being released last week “Julian Assange: The Unauthorarised Autobiography,” hasn’t managed to shift more than 1,000 [...]

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Latoya Jackson Doesn’t Sound Mental When She Says Michael Was Murdered By Shadowy Forces

by Matthew Laidlow

You know what the Jackson family are kinda like? Performing dolphins that entertain crowds of clapping idiots who pay money to see overgrown fish jump through burning hoops. Trainers of dolphins usually use the Joe Jackson guidance method which generally involves beating the creature until it does what you want it to do. Michael Jackson [...]

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The Ghost Of Gordon The Gopher Shall No Longer Haunt Holly Willoughby

by Kris Silver

Ladies and gentleman, a modern day miracle has occurred, Holly Willoughby has been cured of her fear of ghosts, much to the delight of Phillip Schofield’s long dead career. Willoughby, also affectionately known as the Willobooby, suffered from Spectrophobia (which it turns out is a genuine phobia and not a bad 70s sci fi series) [...]

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