Even in death, Michael Jackson’s attracts a carnival of freaks and oddballs, all wanting to chirrup about how wonderful/damaged/dead the former King Of Pop is. And this week, things have gotten really super.
How super? The Incredible Hulk super, that’s how much!
For some reason, former Hulk Lou Ferrigno is getting involved in the Moonwalking For Justice trial and wants everyone to know that, in his expert opinion, Jackson ‘seemed fine’. Before that, we’ve also got a mistress and some video PROOF of Jackson’s murder to contend with.
We can’t work out why Michael Jackson ended up being a close friend with Lou Ferrigno. He even hired him as him personal trainer.
Could it be that Jacko was a huge fan of the Hulk? Or did Michael hear those stories about Ferrigno becoming obsessed with a young bodybuilding boy (one person who won’t have heard it is ol’ cloth-ears Lou).
Either way, Ferrigno is convinced that there’s foul play surrounding Michael’s death. He says, in his cute little accent:
“Michael did not deserve to die… something happened – that’s what we’re finding out now.”
What happened? No-one, including The Hulk, knows. Before he died though, Hulk say MICHAEL NO SMASHED.
“There were no signs of physical stress. He did not look stoned, he was not on drugs, but he did complain that he had a lot of problems sleeping.”
And Dr Conrad Murray comes in for some scathing criticism.
“I’m shocked that the doctor, Conrad Murray, looked around and said, ‘Does anybody know CPR?’ Myself, being a Deputy Sheriff for the Los Angeles Sheriff’s Dept., if I was there I would have instantly given him CPR.”
But you weren’t were you, Hulk? You were probably staring at your glutes in the mirror with a vague hard-on, weren’t you? You pig. YOU KILLED JACKSON JUST AS MUCH AS WE ALL DID BY GETTING ON WITH OUR LIVES AND HITTING REFRESH ON CNN AND BBC WEBSITES TO SEE IF TMZ’S RUMOUR WAS TRUE.
Elsewhere, Dr. Conrad Murray?s mistress (what a stud!) was expected to take the stand to show jurors that he has a messy, but very sexy personal life. Nicole Alvarez, a Santa Monica actress, testified at a hearing earlier this year about being one of three women in a relationships with the married, but very sexy doctor.
There’s also sexy cocktail waitresses, call-girls and more being lined-up. While this seems like lousy philandering, at least he wasn’t tucking minors into their beds, eh?
That all said, it doesn’t really matter. The whole case should be thrown out with the morning trash because MJ’s internet populace has already worked everything out, as this video, which is in no way made by a short-sighted crackpot, shows.
ENJOY BALLBUSTERS.
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Whhhyyyyyyyyyy says
Do I always fall the trick of clicking on your video links?!
Damn you Hecklerspray!
Evil bastards!
Just evil….. sigh.