Posts tagged as:

charity

TwitRelief Lets You Buy Celebs But Not For That Kind Of Relief

by Justrestingmyeyes

God, what a laugh we all have on Twitter! Don’t we? Isn’t it a total laugh? All those people we’ve met! OK, not met, most of them. But we follow them, and we feel we know them all intimately, because we now know when they tried Marmite cereal bars for the first time, what song [...]

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Mariah Carey Isn’t Exactly Giving Her Gaddafi Money Back, But She Does Feel Kinda Bad About It

by Mof Gimmers

Beyonce and Nelly Furtado have stepped forward, held their hands up and said “Ah. Didn’t really know we were playing gigs for the family of despotic leader Gaddafi and getting paid with blood money. Soz.” And as such, the pair have given their pay cheques to charity, thereby, restoring a trace of belief in the [...]

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Plan B Thinks Drugs Are Just Great And Hates His Dad

by Mof Gimmers

Plan B may have “conquered soul music” (AAARRRRGH) and is now planning to conquer reggae with his new LP (AAAAARGH! MAKE IT STOP! PLEASE!), but he hasn’t always been the post-millennia answer to Brian Harvey. No, once upon a time, he was scrotey drug dealer who thought it was okay to stab people. Not our [...]

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Anonymous Philanthropists U2 Fund Development Of 2020 Irish Emo Scene

by Si Sharp

The best thing about being super-rich is that, rather than let governments decide how to spend your tax, you can just keep hold of it, then donate some to a groovy cause, whilst getting baskets of praise and verbal fellatio for making a really exciting thing happen. Imagine a world where we could all do [...]

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Hypocrisy Motivates Plan B

by Michael Park

Perhaps we’re just taking Plan B the wrong way. He’s doubtless a talented man with an ability to pen an upbeat pop melody with a very vague hint of 60s’ swagger about it. He’s also excellent at sounding like a girl, but that’s probably not a fair criticism of his singing voice. In fact, up [...]

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Coldplay To Release New Concept Album (aka Kill Yourself Now)

by Michael Park

Neil Young once said that “It’s better to burn out ’cause rust never sleeps”, advice that has not been lost on many musical acts of the last couple of decades. Usually indie and rock bands whose opportunity to ‘burn out’ comes from being dropped by their record label after a disappointing second release. However, the [...]

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Facebook Founder Teams Up With Bill Gates For Charity

by Kris Silver

Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg is apparently a really nice guy. Him and some of his nerdy mates have pledged to give all their stupidly vast fortunes away to noble causes either during their lifetimes or after their death. Presumably this is so we all forget all the data and privacy problems Facebook has been plagued [...]

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Keep A Child Alive Celebrities Are Finally Allowed Back on Twitter, Thank Heavens For That!

by Amy Grindhouse

Thank Heavens an incongruous group of self-publicising celebrities are finally allowed back on Twitter and Facebook, to shill products in messages that are really ads – thank you, Khloe Kardashian. The stars in question are some of Twitter and Facebook’s most prolific, including Kardashian sisters Kim and Khloe, Lady Gaga, Justin Timberlake, Ryan Seacrest, and [...]

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Coldplay Fail To Grasp Concept Of ‘Awareness Raising’ By Playing ‘Secret’ Gig. Imbeciles.

by Paul Pencott

Terrible, terrible bland-meisters Coldplay have taken time off from providing the soundtrack to every tiresome Ikea-furnished dinner party hosted by those really ‘sincere’ friends of yours that you actually really don’t like (they’ve got white fairy-lights in their tastefully-decorated front-room for God’s sake) to raise consciousness for the homeless charity Crisis. Whilst ignoring the irony [...]

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You! Buy Snoop Dogg’s Non-Golden Garden Shed! On eBay!

by Shawn Lindseth

Do the 18″ spinning rims on your lawn mower get rain-spotted because you don’t have any kind of a structure to keep it in? Is your rake plated in gold but you’d never know it because it got lost under a pile of leaves last fall due to piss poor tool organisation? Whenever you’re in [...]

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