So that’s it. No more American Idol for another year. Last night Adam Lambert and Kris Allen sang their final songs, so it’s over.
No, hang on, wait – there’s still tonight’s American Idol final results show to go. But, hey, that shouldn’t take too long, should it? Hello, here’s the winner, goodbye. Probably three, three and a half minutes, tops.
What? Two hours? Two full hours, plus the inevitable 30 minutes of unplanned overtime because Paula Abdul will get overexcited while answering a question and start speaking in whalesong for no good reason whatsoever? Thanks, American Idol. You’re spoiling us. Really.