Hey kids, are you excited about the Hannah Montana movie? You are? Well you’re doing better than Miley Cyrus, then.
Because Miley Cyrus, um, isn’t. Even though Hannah Montana: The Movie comes out in less than a fortnight, Miley Cyrus is already so bored of the whole thing that she’s ruled out the possibility of making any sequels to it.
You know what this means – no Hannah Montana 2. And no Hannah Montana 3: Hannah’s Big City Vacation. And no Hannah Montana 4: Aquatic Adventuresplash. And no Hannah Montana 5: Requiem For A Tween. Miley Cyrus, you can really be an awful cow sometimes.
If anything ever derails Miley Cyrus’ career in the future, it’s not going to be her weird compulsion to take her clothes off on the internet, her terrifying propensity for possibly accidental racism or the way that her speaking voice sounds like Mumm-Ra‘s emphysemic death rattle. No, it’ll be a lack of motivation that does Miley Cyrus in.
Because why would Miley Cyrus want to do anything more with her life? She’s already living a 16-year-old’s dream life – fame, no school, enough money to physically and emotionally bulldoze her parents into doing exactly what she wants, a topless grown-up underwear model to roll around with – so doing anything at all must feel like a terrible chore for her.
That’s why there’s a constant question mark hanging over the future of Hannah Montana, and we’d imagine it’s why – during the world premiere of the Hannah Montana movie trailer – Miley Cyrus was pulling a face like a cat that’s just belched a dogturd up into the back of its throat.
Is it the reason why Miley Cyrus is refusing to make any more Hannah Montana movies after this one this released? Possibly, although Miley’s buggered if she’s going to actually admit it. USmagazine reports:
“I feel like this is a TV show, and we got really lucky with having the material to make one movie,” the actress/singer said Monday, reports UsMagazine.com. “To do another one, I feel like it takes away the reality of it all.”
Miley Cyrus does have a point, of course – making a sequel to a movie adaptation of a money-spinning TV show about a girl with a secret pop star identity, starring the millionaire daughter of the rat-tailer performer of 1992 country crossover hit Achey Breaky Heart would totally take away the reality of it all. Well done Miley. Good use of common sense.
But all joking aside, it’s easy to understand why Miley Cyrus wants to draw a line under Hannah Montana. Keep doing it too long and she’ll end up as a dumpy Sabrina The Teenage Witch-style joke. Besides, Miley probably has so much left that she wants to accomplish professionally. That emotional meltdown and subsequent slow descent into paranoid drug hell won’t just happen by itself, you know.
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Meli says
I totally agree with this article!! I think she is just going to turn around and try to keep up being famous with her “singing and acting skills”. But those are not going to get her anywhere. She is obviously going to quit being Hannah Montana after this season, and disappoint all of the little children that are Hannah Montana fans. She is very heartless, and nobody likes her when she is not Hannah Montana, I think she should finally gome to grips with that fact, or she is never going to survive in Hollywood. I just feel sorry for the kids, they love her, she’s our “disney princess” soon she’ll be on the same list as Ariel the mermaid, and Belle, the beauty. Well, she’s not going to get to that pedestal with her skills luckily. Miley, stop lying, stop dating that model, stop underage drinking, stop thinking that you’re better than everyone else. If you want to get anywhere Miley, continue being Hannah Montana, I’m sure the parents of America can bear you for another season, but after that, you’re toast.
Guy Bauman says
Stop picking on Miley!!! She is the BEST. My daughter dresses like Miley and I get hard just watching her. When are you coming to Tel Aviv, Miley?
katie jackson says
the movie will be sad i cant bervie that there will be no more hannah montana they were getting so much better i will miss it and i think she been a moody she would do so well doing more films iam so anyoyed now its shit
Lyric says
ok dude that’s just sick
ImissBratzcloe102 says
NEVER. lol
Jessica Mark says
Okay , I think she has stop making movies because she wanted to be naked in front of people. My friend told me !