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Bieber’s Baby Is Back For Round 2

by Kris Silver

STOP THE PRESSES! The Bieber baby drama may not be quite as dead as we all thought. Jeffrey Leving, the lawyer representing Bieber’s baby momma, Mariah Yeater, has come out and said that the DNA test is still on! Meaning there’s still a chance that Justin really was bustin’ to get freaky with the single [...]

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Justin Bieber Is Not A Dad, Which Is A Gasping Shame For All Concerned

by Mof Gimmers

It looks like Justin Bieber won’t have a little friend to play with in his sandbox after Mariah Yeater dropped her lawsuit which alleged that the infant singer fathered her four-month old son with his hairless willy. The depressing thing about that is, in particular, that he almost certainly didn’t tell a young fan that [...]

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Has Justin Bieber Effectively Admitted To Having Unprotected Sex With Fan?

by Mof Gimmers

So Justin Bieber got all pissy when he heard that some lass was saying that she’d given birth to his baby, baby, baby oooh. He told us to forget those stupid claims and focus on his criminally awful Christmas album instead. However, one thing Bieber wasn’t too good at refuting was the small matter of [...]

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Justin Bieber: The Dog Is Not His, And The Baby? Well…

by Mof Gimmers

So. The big news about Justin Bieber is this: He’s putting a Christmas album out that is so bad that the holiday season is going to be cancelled (the terrorists have finally won). He’s also adopted a dog. He’s also sired a child with a woman who kinda raped him, legally speaking. Okay? We’re up [...]

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Justin Bieber Gets Fan Pregnant With Corny ‘I Want To Feel Everything’ Line

by Mof Gimmers

The World of teeth snappingly annoying pop has been dealt a major blow today as rumours of the World’s most talented lesbian, Justin Bieber, has fathered a child with a fan. And not just any fan, but an older fan, turning her into an immediate MBLF (Mother Bieb’d Love Fuffing). Obviously these are just rumours [...]

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Great News – Justin Bieber’s Balls Have Dropped

by Mof Gimmers

It’s awful being a teenager. Your skin starts bubbling like some terrible sauce, your face becomes covered in some kind of feathery down leaving you looking like a weeping willow and, most crucially, your voice starts acting like a jerk. If being a teen wasn’t embarrassing enough (and of course NO-ONE UNDERSTANDS YOU), people say [...]

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Justin Bieber Records Some Christmas Songs And Kills The Holiday Season At The Same Time

by Matthew Laidlow

Even though today is officially Halloween – a day where everyone is allowed to dress like a devilish ghoul and stick two fingers up at God, the occasion has already past. Unless you work in a wacky office environment, they’ll be no badly hung up Halloween decorations. Halloween was unofficially shifted to Saturday 29th October [...]

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N-Dubz: Fazer To Be Set On ‘Stunned’ By Misha B.

by Paul Pencott

Do you see the hilarious pun we did in the headline? Do you? It’s writing like this that wins prestigious awards. So, N-Dubz – you know, the guy in the silly hat, the quite fit one and the other dude – have been a bit quiet of late, what with Dappy going it alone with [...]

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Want To Meet Justin Bieber As He Turns On Westfield’s Christmas Lights With His Mind?

by Mof Gimmers

Are you one of those shrieking tweens who just loves Justin Bieber sooooo much that, given the chance, you’d kiss his little face so much that it would drop off his undeveloped cranium? YOU ARE? Good news then! See, you can get the chance to meet your pint-sized hero as he switches on the Christmas [...]

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Catherine Tate Is Going Out With Jason Orange Even Though He’s Clearly… Y’know?

by Mof Gimmers

Jason Orange. You know him don’t you? That’s right! He’s from Take That. He’s really good at dancing. He’s a very good dancer. He’s a good emoter as well. And he’s quite obviously… y’know? Isn’t he? Well, even though Jason Orange is totally, surely? he’s apparently dating a woman. That woman is called Catherine Tate. [...]

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