Caroline Flack Gets Death Threats From Clearly Insane One Direction Fans

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Uh-oh! Caroline Flack is getting received death threats from Harry Styles’ fans after it was revealed that the pair have been on some dates. What is it with young women and their penchant for sending death threats?

WHY HAVEN’T WE HAD ANY? DO WE HAVE TO HAVE SEX WITH A YOUNG MAN TO DO SO?

On that point, it appears hecklerspray is the only publication willing to point out that it is incredibly sinister the way adult women feel it is perfectly fine for them to fap over a bunch of 10 year old singing boys. Never mind death threats, how about some police involvement here?!

Aaaanyway. Where were we? Oh yes. Death threats. The Xtra Factor presenter and the One Direction boythrob have been bumping uglies, despite the fact there’s a 36-year age gap between the two.

Of course, fans of 8-year-old Harry (calling themselves Directioners because they don’t want Beliebers to have the monopoly on collective nouns for simpletons) aren’t happy about the fact that they aren’t the ones tearing the young singer a new cock-hole.

And so, they’ve taken to twitter.

A source says:

“Twitter just went mad. People have been saying really horrible things. Caroline’s really shaken and upset.”

And that’s just from spending time with the dreadful, grabby Olly Murs. One message said:

“If caroline flack flirts with my boyfriend (Harry) I will personally hunt her down and shoot her.”

HURRAY! We’ve got a new Mark Chapman. Another message said:

“I want to kill you Caroline Flack, Harry is mine Bitch”

Someone else sensibly pointed out:

“Caroline Flack is 32. She should be settling and ready to have kids not dating them.”

Of course, the ironic thing here is that Harry and Flack aren’t doing anything untoward at all. Flack took to her own twitter account to say:

“Hi one direction fans! To clarify. I’m close friends with harry. He’s one of the nicest people I know. I don’t deserve death threats. :) x”

This has prompted Harry to come to Flack’s aid and try and help her through this difficult time. You know what that means? There’s a grief-shag in the offing and you mental Directioners have gone and forced them together with some twisted remote Stockholm Syndrome.

WELL DONE YOU.

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