We've long been of the understanding that it's OK to never do anything worthwhile so long as you at least think about doing worthwhile stuff once in a while, and that's a view that Paris Hilton obviously shares.
Not so long ago we reported that Paris Hilton had decided to show her compassionate new outlook by travelling to Rwanda and lifting the spirits of its broken people by looking them in the eye and saying "Eww, those flies around your eyes are totally gross and shit." However, thanks to an 'organisational restructuring' at the charity that had planned Paris Hilton's Rwanda trip, the jaunt has now apparently been postponed. It just goes to show that you learn something new every day – and today we learnt that 'organisational restructuring' is code for 'the idiot who suggested that Paris Hilton should go to Rwanda has been knocked unconscious and locked in the basement because frankly those people have already suffered enough.'
All Paris Hilton has ever wanted to do is help people, although we'll admit that her intentions have been a little oblique sometimes. Once you understand that House Of Wax was made so that even the most cack-handed student filmmaker could look at their appalling work and feel that at least it isn't as bad as House Of Wax, or that Stars Are Blind was Paris Hilton's way of helping manic depressives to realise that there really isn't anything worth living for, then Paris Hilton's career makes perfect sense. Also, The Simple Life was Paris Hilton's deliberate effort to promote childhood exercise, because the theme-tune alone was enough to make kids run away from their TV sets as fast as they could.
But after Paris Hilton's drink-driving arrest last year – which, incidentally, only happened because Paris was trying to boost the revenue of a local burger bar – and subsequent jail time, Paris decided that she needed to drop all the pretences and help as many people as possible for as often as possible. And that included a week-long visit to Rwanda with a charitable organisation, where Paris Hilton could show her complete empathy for the locals because spending three weeks in a room with substandard pillows and only almost-unlimited cellphone access is a lot like living in Rwanda forever when you think about it.
Anyway, it's not happening any more. Reuters reports:
The charitable organization sponsoring Hilton's planned trip to the African nation, part of her aim to swap partying for philanthropy, said on Thursday it was postponing the journey. The Spanish-based group, Playing for Good, said it was cancelling the trip due to a "restructuring" in its organization. "Paris has been a loyal and gracious supporter of Playing for Good, but the foundation has to regrettably reschedule this trip," the group said in a statement. The group said it hoped to reschedule "at a later date."
That later date presumably being Plepvember 37th in the year four million AD. We don't know about you, but we're not buying this 'organisational restructuring' line at all. Perhaps Playing For Good realised that it could probably put its donations to more effective use if it spent them on helping the children of Rwanda instead of paying for some vapid, slurring millionaire nobtard to go and look at the children of Rwanda for an upcoming documentary called Isn't Paris Hilton So Very Compassionate, who knows?
Still, never one to dwell on failures, Paris Hilton has decided to get as close as she possibly can to visiting Rwanda in spite of Playing For Good's postponement. And that means if you live in the Los Angeles area and your name is R.Wanda, expect a bimbo to come and stare at your children for an hour or two in the next few weeks.
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