Hello, and welcome to another hecklerspray. What’s that? Sorry, but we couldn’t quite hear you.
It’s probably because we’re blasting Electric Youth, track 7 of Debbie Gibson‘s critically acclaimed second album, also entitled Electric Youth. We realise most people might think it’s entirely too loud, but loud is the only way to listen to such an incredible talent.
Allow us, if you will, to reach past our 8.5×11 full-colour glossy autographed copy of a Debbie Gibson 2003 head shot, past our recently acquired eBay-sandwich bag full of Debbie Gibson hair and soap scrapings, and past the finely stitched velveteen pillow delicately covered in rose petals and lip-shaped chap stick smudges, to turn down the volume. That’s for Debbie. The pillow is for Debbie.
What’s that? You didn’t know any of us Deb-heads still existed? You may be surprised to know, then, that there are enough of us to almost literally fill the convention room of the Renaissance Inn down in Oklahoma City. One such fan even stalked her recently – followed her all the way to her hotel room. She did not appreciate this at all.
The country of Spain loves a good bull fight. Also they love murdering all Aztecs everywhere and throwing doubloons deep into the ocean. That’s all they like though. Seriously – they can fit it all on two cable channels.
Oh – and they love Debbie Gibson too. At least enough for her to sing in things called ‘nationwide performances.’ The people there really eat it up. One things for sure though – she doesn’t reciprocate the affections.
That’s not true. Gibson would likely be the first to tell you every single lyric she’s written in the past decade and a half, she’s written with España in mind. Except for one of them anyway.
One Spanish fan has gone too far. All he wanted to do was marry Debbie forever and carry her perfect babies for as many trimesters as it took, but he showed it in awkward ways. As Colin Farrell, Sandra Bullock, Tyra Banks and Conan O’Brien might all tell you, the delivery makes all the difference. Jordi Bassas Puigdollers, though, showed it through unsolicited phone calls, emails, trips backstage, and once even by following Debbie back to her hotel room and slipping a well-written ‘Let’s meet’ note under her door. Puigdollers was contacted for a comment, and he said:
“I wanted to use the fan club to help people who can’t go see her to get autographs and photos.”
You can’t act like that, our Spanish friend. For the good of your very freedom, you have to move on. If you really need someone to cling to, might we suggest either Tiffany or Samantha Fox. They don’t really respond to fan mail either, but so far they haven’t been that mean about it.
We keep pushing for them to double-headline the Utah state fair. It appears things are booked clear through 2015.
Read More:
Debbie Gibson Seeks Restraining Order Against Spanish Man – Associated Press
gir says
EXCUSE ME??!?!??! I THINK YOU MEAN DEBORAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Shawn Lindseth says
Well that’s certainly what her voicemail says. I know because I called her last week when her eye and shoulder gestures told me to in her old 1988 music video.
gir says
DEBORAH Gibson did her best work with the Circle Jerks.