R&B is sexier than any other musical genre.

Think about it – you ain’t gonna have much luck pulling the laydeez with your swept-haircut indie or your monocle-wearing classical or your no-one-really-likes-it-anyway jazz fusion. The most immediate way to make yourself attractive is to give yourself a smooth backing track full of ‘woah-oh’s and ‘mmmmm-baby-yeah’s.

This is something advertisers have been quick to latch onto. You can make virtually any product sleek and super-fine by associating it with a laid-back groove and harmonious vocal stylings. Right? Right? Eh? Are we right or are we right? We’re right. We always are.

Oh – apart from the commercial for Mr. Sprigg’s Barbeque.

This is … well … more just weird.

Most of the time it will be quite accessible, but then we may crank it up a notch to leave you with a horrible taste in your mouth. You know, like when slurping down some two month old milk complete with that yummy lumpy flavouring.

After the last few weeks of giving you nice and pleasant stuff to download and share it’s about time to offer something that will hopefully make you laugh. Or if you’re Mary Whitehouse, send us verbal abuse for us to ignore.

Kunt And The Gang offer an alternative view of love songs. Well that’s what we think anyway. Whatever the case, they still amuse us.

Unless you’re a bit slow, you’ve probably not realised that any band with the word Kunt (that’s ‘kunt’ with a k) isn’t going to be in the best of taste. For any train spotters out there, it’s also hecklerspray’s second band in recent times who have the word ‘cunt’ in the name. So are we just being annoying and writing about stuff that will confuse most of you? It would appear not.

Listen to a song on mainstream TV or radio and you’re not going to be listening to anything with any sort of humour attached to it. All we get are blokes sounding like they’ve been kicked in the knackers before belting out shite ballad after shite ballad. Why can’t we have some fun?

Our previous discoveries in the humour department have led us to Cassetteboy – the only slight difference between the two is that Kunt And The Gang don’t seem to piss over copyright laws as much. We say “as much”, because we aren’t sure that Carol Vorderman would approve of herself being the centre of a brilliantly crafted song all about various sexual acts.

The music of Kunt And The Gang isn’t to be taken seriously at all. When looking at reviews for some of their records, such as – I Have A Little Wank And I Have A Little Cry and One Last Wank And One Last Cry it appears that the reviewers have got the wrong end of the stick. Amazingly enough, this is meant to be funny and to get people to laugh.

Ignore all the swearing and have a laugh – seriously, if you don’t smile during songs such as Fucksticks you don’t deserve to have a sense of humour. Hell, the people behind this project work so quick that there’s even a tribute song to Barry George on there (remember – he was stalking other women at the time and not Jill Dando).

If anyone can tell us the inspiration for the band name, leave it in the comment box and we’ll send you a whole packet of Space Raiders. Or failing that, some used pens. You can decide.

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Kunt and the Gang

There are many, many better ways. Surely. Hooking up with that mad-haired berk isn’t going to help her claw back the piles and piles of sanity the girl seems to have lost over the last couple of years.

Let’s be totally honest – it’s going to damage her more than she already is, and that’s before she’s even spoken to the man who dresses like a particularly stupid pirate.

But hecklerspray didn’t get in fast enough with our warnings, leaving poor old crazy Britney Spears free to appear alongside Russell Brand in some MTV promotional adverts for the upcoming Video Music Awards.

It still isn’t confirmed if Britters herself will be in attendance at the awards as she hasn’t got permission off her dad yet, but hopefully the blow to her psyche that surely occurred when she met the TV and radio ‘funny’ man will have been too much, forcing her to stay at home on the night. The other option doesn’t even bear thinking about, frankly.

For now, the only thing we can say with so-called ‘facts’ backing us up is that there have been a few promotional skits released and… well… they’re quite good, really.

Brand is still an irritating prannock, but he does at least have the good sense to make a joke of the fact that no one in the US knows who he is – and believe us, oh American readers out there, you don’t want to know who Russell Brand is – whereas Britney is actually quite charming, seemingly happy to poke fun at herself.

Does this mean we’re allowed to make fun of her again? Or is it still too serious an issue, that she’s gone mental and her life has fallen to pieces and all that gumph? No? Still not cool? Okay – just checking.

Did we mention there’s an elephant in the videos? Yes – in an all-too-subtle move on the part of the ad creators, they’ve decided to quite literally tackle the issue of the elephant in the room. And it’s actually borderline clever, the crafty little buggers – obviously it’s still blatant enough for the MTV’s core demographic to get the joke (it’s referring to Britney’s performance at last year’s VMAs, you fools!), but at the same time it’s pretty brave on their part.

We should stop writing with hangovers, it makes us too nice.

Russell Brand is an arsehole, Britney Spears went mental let’s all point and laugh… ahh, that feels better.

Anyway, a couple of the ads are below for your viewing pleasure. They’re bound to raise at least a smile, and it’s good to see Britney looking less like a skank-harpy of death (twice in a month). She leaves that honour to Brand.

Zing!

On shows like You've Been Framed, the hosts always go out of their way to point out that nobody got injured during any of the pratfalls.

Here, though, we wouldn't be so sure – it's a video of some kids taking a run-up and booting a concrete football as hard as they can. Again and again and again. If you find this funny, chances are you're going to hell along with the rest of us.

And then, once you've got over the horror of watching children basically disabling themselves, you'll gave to cope with the laugh in the background. The laugh that's essentially stopped us from ever having a good night's sleep ever again.

Hey, cat owners! Tired of your pet basically ignoring you and dragging half-dead frogs into your house all the time? Well, why not cover them in sticky tape as a sort of freakish revenge ploy!

That seems to be the gist of this clip, anyway – it looks as if you can really bugger up a cat's ability to walk by strapping a load of sticky tape across its fur. We think – not being able to speak Japanese, we have no idea whether this is a specially-trained tape cat or whether you can make all cats walk around like wankers if you bung a strip of masking tape on their backs. You can always try it on your cat to find out, you know. And video it. And send us the Youtube link. 

And, no, this definitely isn't cruel to cats. Well, it might be a bit cruel. But it's funny. And isn't that more important?