Posts tagged as:

fans

Mariah Yeater Wants Justin Bieber To Take Another DNA Test Just To See If He Has Any

by Mof Gimmers

You know the woman who said Justin Bieber rode her for 30 seconds backstage at one of his gigs, and as a result, popped out a small baby? Well, Mariah Yeater is at it again, asking for more of Justin’s DNA. Presumably, the first DNA test came back with a report noting that Bieber was [...]

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Bieber’s Baby Is Back For Round 2

by Kris Silver

STOP THE PRESSES! The Bieber baby drama may not be quite as dead as we all thought. Jeffrey Leving, the lawyer representing Bieber’s baby momma, Mariah Yeater, has come out and said that the DNA test is still on! Meaning there’s still a chance that Justin really was bustin’ to get freaky with the single [...]

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Justin Bieber Is Not A Dad, Which Is A Gasping Shame For All Concerned

by Mof Gimmers

It looks like Justin Bieber won’t have a little friend to play with in his sandbox after Mariah Yeater dropped her lawsuit which alleged that the infant singer fathered her four-month old son with his hairless willy. The depressing thing about that is, in particular, that he almost certainly didn’t tell a young fan that [...]

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WEBTHUMP! Hand On The Thump!

by Michael Park

This is the second week of us throwing open the floodgates of the internet to you people. Seen something exciting, interesting, plain weird or even just funny enough to draw a snort of laughter from Christopher Biggins? Well, give Dep Ed Michael a shout and he’ll put them in here and allow people to bask [...]

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Has Justin Bieber Effectively Admitted To Having Unprotected Sex With Fan?

by Mof Gimmers

So Justin Bieber got all pissy when he heard that some lass was saying that she’d given birth to his baby, baby, baby oooh. He told us to forget those stupid claims and focus on his criminally awful Christmas album instead. However, one thing Bieber wasn’t too good at refuting was the small matter of [...]

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Readers’ Letters: “i bet you will remove my comment eh?”

by Mof Gimmers

Hello dipsticks. We haven’t done a readers’ letters for a while have we? To be honest, we’ve been busy. Busy lording it up at an award ceremony and, prior to that, begging you for votes and rigging the process so that we definitely won. Also, we’ve been very wounded by those slating the video. We [...]

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Justin Bieber: The Dog Is Not His, And The Baby? Well…

by Mof Gimmers

So. The big news about Justin Bieber is this: He’s putting a Christmas album out that is so bad that the holiday season is going to be cancelled (the terrorists have finally won). He’s also adopted a dog. He’s also sired a child with a woman who kinda raped him, legally speaking. Okay? We’re up [...]

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WEBTHUMP! Thump Up The Volume!

by Michael Park

From now on, Webthump will be a collection of the best things that you, yes you, the readers have found on the internet. Exciting stuff! All you have to do to get your name in lights is tweet the best thing you’ve seen on the internet recently at our scumbag deputy ed Michael (@GreatCollapso). It’s [...]

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Justin Bieber Gets Fan Pregnant With Corny ‘I Want To Feel Everything’ Line

by Mof Gimmers

The World of teeth snappingly annoying pop has been dealt a major blow today as rumours of the World’s most talented lesbian, Justin Bieber, has fathered a child with a fan. And not just any fan, but an older fan, turning her into an immediate MBLF (Mother Bieb’d Love Fuffing). Obviously these are just rumours [...]

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Great News – Justin Bieber’s Balls Have Dropped

by Mof Gimmers

It’s awful being a teenager. Your skin starts bubbling like some terrible sauce, your face becomes covered in some kind of feathery down leaving you looking like a weeping willow and, most crucially, your voice starts acting like a jerk. If being a teen wasn’t embarrassing enough (and of course NO-ONE UNDERSTANDS YOU), people say [...]

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