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Christian Bale

Christian Bale Went Spazzy Over Sister Cash Request: Claim

by Stuart Heritage

Christian Bale is easily our hero of the week – his dedication to clown-attacking even extends to his own clown mother, for god’s sake.

But, in all of this possibly-illegal motherclown-beating kerfuffle, one question has stood out above all others – what makes a newly-minted megastar like Christian Bale start whaling on his mother and sister on the happiest day of his life?

Turns out the reason might be cash. According to reports today, Christian Bale kicked off after his sister asked him for £100,000 to help raise her three children. Frankly we’re disgusted – doesn’t Christian Bale know that all children have the right to receive occasional gifts of more than the average British annual working wage that their mother has managed to guilt out of their moviestar uncle? Shame on you, Mr Bale. Shame on you indeed.

Christian Bale is easily our hero of the week - his dedication to clown-attacking even extends to his own clown mother, for god's sake. But, in all of this possibly-illegal motherclown-beating kerfuffle, one question has stood out above all others - what makes a newly-minted megastar like Christian Bale start whaling on his mother and sister on the happiest day of his life? Turns out the reason might be cash. According to reports today, Christian Bale kicked off after his sister asked him for £100,000 to help raise her three children. Frankly we're disgusted - doesn't Christian Bale know that all children have the right to receive occasional gifts of more than the average British annual working wage that their mother has managed to guilt out of their moviestar uncle? Shame on you, Mr Bale. Shame on you indeed.
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Christian Bale Becomes New Superhero: Bailman

by Ian Dransfield

Method acting must be great – it provides a surefire way of behaving like something of an idiot in polite society. That is, unless you decide to go home and assault your mum and sister, as it was alleged Christian Bale had gone and done yesterday. That takes things a bit far, away from the [...]

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Batman Christian Bale Arrested For Allegedly Beating Mum And Sister Up

by Stuart Heritage

So you’re Christian Bale; you’re the star of The Dark Knight – one of the biggest movies ever – but Heath Ledger’s stolen your acclaim.

What do you do to redress the balance? Simple, you go a bit mental, attack your mother and sister and get arrested on suspicion of assault for it. True, it might not be the obvious way around the problem, but it’s what Christian Bale seems to have done.

So with Heath Ledger dead and Christian Bale arrested for assault, it seems like The Dark Knight might be carrying a dark curse. We’ll know for sure as soon as Michael Caine climbs up a church tower and starts firing a machine gun at passers-by and crying, but for now it’s just a pretty strong hunch.

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Christian Bale All Like ‘More Batman Please’

by Stuart Heritage

It’s not out yet, but The Dark Knight looks set to be the second biggest movie of the summer starring a freaky dead guy who gives us the creeps, after Indiana Jones.

And Christian Bale seems to think that The Dark Knight will be such a success that he’s itching to make a third Batman movie already. Bale says he’s looking forward to seeing whether Christopher Nolan can top the artistry and emotional intensity of this film, and that he’d love to be a part of it.

Yeah yeah yeah – listen, Christian Bale can spout as much nonsense about artistic worth as he likes, because we all know why he wants to make another Batman film. It’s because Batman law quite clearly states that the third Batman movie in any series is the point where the Bat-nipple comes into play. You’d have to be a crazy person to turn down the Bat-nipple.

It's not out yet, but The Dark Knight looks set to be the second biggest movie of the summer starring a freaky dead guy who gives us the creeps, after Indiana Jones. And Christian Bale seems to think that The Dark Knight will be such a success that he's itching to make a third Batman movie already. Bale says he's looking forward to seeing whether Christopher Nolan can top the artistry and emotional intensity of this film, and that he'd love to be a part of it. Yeah yeah yeah - listen, Christian Bale can spout as much nonsense about artistic worth as he likes, because we all know why he wants to make another Batman film. It's because Batman law quite clearly states that the third Batman movie in any series is the point where the Bat-nipple comes into play. You'd have to be a crazy person to turn down the Bat-nipple.
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Christian Bale Set To Save World From Robots

by David Schwartz

Christian Bale is used to battling with bloodthirsty robots bent on world domination – he works in Hollywood after all!

So signing up to be in the new Terminator movie should be a breeze for the Batman Begins star.

Reports suggest Christian Bale is close to agreeing a deal to play ‘mankind’s saviour’ John Connor in Terminator Salvation: The Future Begins, due to start filming in Budapest in April.

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