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Christian Bale

WEBTHUMP! Thursday 5 February 2009

by Stuart Heritage

9 – Here’s the man Christian Bale went mental on. Now we can sort of understand why – Kodak

8 – Get a tan from your computer – YouTube

7 – Headline: Man Caught With Pigeons In His Trousers – Metro

6 – Here’s a newsreader doing the most spectacular live faint that we’ve ever seen – I Am Bored

5 – Surprise of the week: Facebook makes you depressed – Readwriteweb

4 – Want to make a sausage zombie? OK! – Instructables

3 – Ten things men should never do in public – Askmen

2 – Kids, don’t do drugs. Seven-year-old kids, definitely don’t do drugs – YouTube

1 – LIL’ O’REILLY! HOORAY! – Funnyordie

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Christian Bale Rant: Stars Continue To Spoil Our Fun

by Stuart Heritage

Christian Bale’s Terminator rant is easily the best thing to happen to the world in about five years – fact.

But what’s also fact is it’s not universally loved. The sad truth is that some saps can’t take pleasure from a recording of a prick being a prick to an prick. And, inevitably, most of those people are famous.

So far, Whoopi Goldberg and Terry Crews have stood up for Christian Bale, building hopes that there’ll soon be an all-star charity concert to raise awareness of the rights of unbearably dickish actors with indeterminate accents so. Fingers crossed it’s called AH-DAH-DAH-DAH-DAH-Aid.

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Christian Bale’s Furious Rant ‘No Big Deal’, Says Cowering AD

by Stuart Heritage

The thing about Christian Bale is that he’s a nice guy. HE’S A NICE GUY! NO! NO! DO NOT SHUT ME UP! NO!

But you probably didn’t realise that. And that’s all thanks to yesterday’s glorious tape of Christian Bale unloading both barrels of his sweary idiot-gun at a director of photography on the Terminator Salvation set.

But, according to a Terminator Salvation assistant director, Christian Bale’s tantrum was a “non-event”. Rumours that he said this while whimpering on his knees while Christian Bale held a knife to his throat and cackled like a maniac are unconfirmed, but probably true.

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Christian Bale’s Terminator Rant Is Easily The Best Thing Ever

by Stuart Heritage

Somewhere, right at this moment, we can absolutely guarantee that Alec Baldwin is breathing a sigh of relief.

Seriously, Alec should send Christian Bale a cookie basket. Because Christian Bale has made sure that Alec Baldwin’s insane ‘ignorant little pig’ rant at his daughter has been relegated to only second most brilliant recorded tantrum in history.

A recording of Christian Bale screaming at a Terminator Salvation DP has hit the internet and, if you do one thing today, you must hear it. It’s not just Christian Bale’s fury, you see – it’s the fact that he rants in about 13 different accents.

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Tropic Thunder Beats The Dark Knight Thanks to Blacked-up Retards

by Ian Dransfield

Well it certainly took long enough but The Dark Knight has finally fallen, to the might of Tropic Thunder and its wall of controversy. While we all thought we would have to live in a world where no other films would ever get anywhere near The Dark Knight – a world where daily recitals of [...]

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Batman 3 is Coming Out Soon! No, Wait – ‘Not’ Soon.

by Ian Dransfield

It looks like there’s going to be a fair wait until Batman 3 pops its fat head out for us all to see. The sequel to the Best Film Ever(tm) that has made more money than the GDP of many African nations combined, The Dark Knight, will get a sequel at some point. On one [...]

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Christian Bale Assault Charges Result in Ultimate Punishment. That, or Just a Caution

by Ian Dransfield

Christian Bale looks likely to get away with allegedly pushing his mum about, if he pleads guilty to assault. The Welshman, who no one seems to realise is Welsh, has been recommended to receive a caution by the Crown Prosecution Service for his alleged actions, should he plead guilty to charges next month. If, however, [...]

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Morgan Freeman Gets More (More) Bad News

by Ian Dransfield

Morgan Freeman has been struck by the evil curse of The Dark Knight yet again. So we may have been a little sceptical about the whole ‘curse’ thing ever since the term started getting bandied around, but on this evidence it’s hard not to think that maybe, just maybe there are nefarious forces at work. [...]

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The Dark Knight Makes Even More Money. Not That We’re Jealous or Anything…

by Ian Dransfield

The Dark Knight has only ruddy well gone and done it again. No, not struck down another member of the cast or crew with the ‘curse’, which is apparently floating around these days. The film has gone and broken the record for the fastest $400 million in box office history, making the money in a [...]

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Morgan Freeman Has a Car Accident: is ‘Recovering’

by Ian Dransfield

Unfortunately, it’s not a DVD outtake for Driving Miss Daisy – that would be much easier to make light of. No – Morgan Freeman is the latest to be involved in the so-called ‘curse’ of The Dark Knight, after he was involved in a car accident on Sunday night, which officials referred to as ‘serious’. [...]

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