Posts tagged as:

Charlie Sheen

The Horribly Lonely Charlie Sheen To Die A Gruesome, Violent Death

by Mof Gimmers

Charlie Sheen was once the talk of the town. He enchanted us all with his spectacular nervous breakdown, his drug taking, his fondness for pornography, his punching of chandeliers and his inventing of various phrases. However, he went off quicker than an opened yoghurt. Still, we left Sheeno with his custody case with Brooke Mueller [...]

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Charlie Sheen And Brooke Mueller Agree Custody Deal That Doesn’t Involve Suitcases Of Cocaine Or Anything Fun

by Mof Gimmers

Remember when Charlie Sheen was worth writing about? Okay, it looked like he was going to die and everything, but we don’t care about him emotionally. We just want to mock a stranger’s misfortune right? So he went about the world saying dumb things about his tiger blood, his fondness for porn actresses and the [...]

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Charlie Sheen May Get Porn House Dream

by Mof Gimmers

Remember a few months ago, when everyone couldn’t stop talking about Charlie Sheen? There was a time he was a champion wreck. He made women cry, invented seven thousand catchphrases, wobbled about on rooftops with massive knives and looked like he was headed for a spectacular early grave. Then he became self-aware, cleaned his act [...]

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Samy Naceri Displays Behaviour That Would Make Charlie Sheen Cry

by Mof Gimmers

Samy Naceri? Who in shit’s name is he? Well, he’s an actor who was in Taxi and Days of Glory? Okay? Just that justify him being on these pages? It shouldn’t matter really as he’s got arrested for flashing, which is hilarious. That’s right, while dealing with autograph hunters, Samy decided to bare his arse [...]

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Ashton Kutcher Says The ‘Men’ Gig Is Like Winning The Lottery (Wholly Undeserved Riches Brought On By Chance?)

by Mof Gimmers

As well you know, Ashton Kutcher is a oddly hairlined berk. He’s managed to make a career out of… well… playing himself. Which is notably, a dunderhead with a six pack and blank look on his head. Still, at least he’s aware of this. How? Well, the pro-goofball – who was recently announced as Charlie [...]

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Incredibly Annoying Charlie Sheen To Be Replaced By Even More Annoying Ashton Kutcher On ‘Men’?

by Mof Gimmers

After rumours floated around the slebphere that Hugh Grant was to take over Charlie Sheen’s role on Two And A Half Men (ostensibly, The Famous One On The Show), everyone scratched their heads and muttered about how little sense it made. Surely a programme like that needs someone more irritating than Hugh Grant? Well, it [...]

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Hugh Grant As Baffling Replacement For Charlie Sheen On Two And A Half Men?

by Mof Gimmers

Hugh ‘It’s All About The Twiglets’ Grant is, and take this with a whole lake of salt, apparently being touted as a replacement for Charlie Sheen in the abjectly awful and heavingly unfunny Two and a Half Men. It would appear that the actor-turned-paparazzi snitch started to be courted around a month ago by CBS [...]

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Charlie Sheen Upsets Ex With Rehab Joke And Threatens To Tour The World

by Mof Gimmers

Charlie Sheen’s Violent Torpedo Of Truth tour has been hobbling around America, confusing and dumbfounding people and making people too thick to think titter every stinkin’ time he wheels out the whole ‘Uh, winning!‘ thing. Until now, this dreadful spectacle has been confined to the boundaries of mainland America… but not for long. That’s because [...]

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We Need To Know What Musicians Think Of Bin Laden’s Death

by Mof Gimmers

The imagined coalition of ‘The West’ has been uniformly sickened with scenes of whooping rebels, cheering the deaths of Americans in various terrorist attacks. See, The West has a moral highground on this one because, when we go around killing people, we get a note from our mum’s first (or, as they’re officially known, The [...]

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Charlie Sheen Gets Lifeline From Denise Richards In Now Boring News Item

by Mof Gimmers

Remember when Charlie Sheen was fun to write about? Remember that? He had people cowering in cupboards, suitcases of cocaine and had a nervous breakdown before our very eyes. And now? He’s gone from meme to admin. How terribly dull. Instead of standing on rooftops waving a machete around, he’s involved in a boring tour [...]

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