What a week for Britney Spears – a new album, an X Factor appearance and an uncomfortably sobby documentary.
And now this. For what appears to be the billionth year on the trot, Britney Spears has been named as the most popular Yahoo search term of the year. Well, technically it was a combination of the search terms ‘Is Britney Spears dead yet?’, ‘Has Britney Spears died?’ ‘Seriously, is Britney Spears dead or not?’ and ‘Britney Speerz is funy LOL’ but none of those scan as well.
What’s most impressive is that Britney Spears managed to beat Barack Obama to the number one spot, which has to smart given his accomplishments this year. But it’s totally his fault – Obama had plenty of chances to put on a pink wig, wander aimlessly through a car park and babble in a British accent in the grip of a full-blown psychiatric meltdown, but instead he chose to become president-elect of America, the big idiot.
No matter how spectacularly she manages to destroy every conceivable aspect of her personal and professional life each year, the first week of December always provides a little bit of a respite for Britney Spears.
Not only is it Britney Spears’ birthday week, which at least allows her to chalk off another year lost to the ravages of alarming mental illness, but it’s also the week when Yahoo announces that more people search for her on the internet than anything else.
We’ve been here before, of course – Britney Spears was the top Yahoo search term in the year when she divorced the father of her children, the year when she shaved her hair and went completely batshit mental and a year prior to those when Britney seemed comparatively normal.
So let’s be fair, being popular on the internet is all Britney Spears has got and, by God, does she ever fight hard to hang onto her crown. Remaining the top internet search term in 2008 was always going to be tricky for Britney – not only had Barack Obama made history by becoming the first ever black president of America, but Britney’s arsehole parents wouldn’t even let her go outside and drive a car through an orphanage or punch cattle square in the face or whatever it is the voices in her head tell her to do – but by christ, she’s done it. According to AP:
Spears bested World Wrestling Entertainment, Barack Obama, Miley Cyrus and the online game “RuneScape” as the five most-searched terms of 2008, the Web portal and search company announced Monday, a day before the singer released her new album “Circus.” Jessica Alba, the anime series “Naruto,” Lindsay Lohan, Angelina Jolie and “American Idol” rounded out the top 10 list.
So how did Britney Spears do it? Well, the fact that Womanizer made it to number one probably helped, as did the heartwarming news that Britney was about to go on her first full tour in several years. And, oh, what was that last thing? We had it a moment ago, but… oh yes, that’s it – the way that Britney Spears had a full-on juddering meltdown that ended up with her being literally locked in a padded room because she couldn’t even remember how to chew food properly. That might have also been a reason, in retrospect.
So congratulations to Britney Spears for being the top internet search term for the fourth consecutive year. And good luck for 2009 because, short of hijacking a bus and driving it off a bridge, we genuinely don’t know how you’re going to out-crazy 2008.
Shalanda says
And lest we not forget… Media to Britney after one of her releases hit #1: ‘Do you have anything to say to your fans?’. Britney to media, ‘No.’
I’m thinking it isn’t just Britney who suffered a full frontal meltdown. The broad took ’em all with her to the circus! LOL
BogusMadonna50 says
Britney is talented and has had a rough time, starting with the hormone changes one goes through in giving child-birth. She continues to be surrounded by the wrong people, people who use her as an means to and end. She needs to realize that she is an adult. She has choices and does not have to participate with people draining her and exploiting her. She does need professional help! It’s not enough to take care of a career, it IS important to get the right psychological help, learn how to master emotions and be happy and at peace in your spirit. Eating junk is so undermining to feeling good. Choices there again, to want to feel good, naturally. I think the public is interested in the truth about Britney, but how can she offer that, herself, at this time? The last five years of her life have been overwhelm. Bipolar disease is harder to manage as one gets older, hormones and lifestyle changes take place. The real madness is that no one wants Britney to grow up! And it’s alarming when she is parroting someone like Madonna (who has never been able to keep her trap shut). The smartest thing Britney could do is stay quiet, do her work, and think about a new life she can create without the need to be in the spotlight. Passion can be found in nature and in being at peace with yourself. It is about growing older, gracefully. And seriously! Look at what a fool Madonna makes of herself, and in treating people and situations as being disposable – no example to follow, by any means! Madonna is just another person who loves to use people as a means to and end. Britney is brighter and more compassionate than that. She just needs to give herself permission to be vigilant about feeling well, and other doors will open for her. She can choose!
Gilbert Wham says
Exactly BogusMadonna, she has had the wrong people round her. She should come and live with you, in that special room in your basement.