It's not well known that Beyonce originally wrote the song Bootylicious as an aggressive diatribe against the conservative views of Muslim Malaysia – also Bills Bills Bills was about how much Beyonce hated ducks' mouths, but that's irrelevant.
What is relevant, though, is that Beyonce's beef with Muslim Malaysia shows no sign of letting up, especially since Beyonce was due to play a concert in Kuala Lumpur next month. On one side of the argument is the conservative government of Malaysia which is attempting to preserve Muslim tradition and history by forcing all female performers to cover up the majority of their bodies at all times, and on the other side is Beyonce who just wants to jiggle around with her arse out like some kind of slag. And, rather than wear non-skimpy outfits, Beyonce has decided to cancel the date and perform in Indonesia instead, where she'll be free to wear whatever whorish American stripper outfit she jolly well likes.
Although in interviews she may come across as an emotionally-distant cyborg hell-bent on world-domination no matter the cost, we get the impression that Beyonce is actually slightly bananas compared to her pop counterparts. For instance, you get the impression that Rihanna has never reduced anyone into spasms of epileptic hysteria like Beyonce has, Shakira wouldn't only eat syrup to get a film role nor has Amy Winehouse ever repeated Beyonce's trick of throwing herself face-first down a flight of stairs in the name of entertainment, although it goes without saying that we wish she had.
However, just because Beyonce is a gold-plated nutcase, it doesn't mean that she's without her standards. Beyonce knows, for instance, that if you ban Beyonce from wearing slutty little outfits when she sings, it won't take long before her audience gets bored and wanders off to the zoo to taunt the animals or something instead. And that goes for Beyonce's audiences everywhere, even in hard-line Muslim countries where that sort of thing isn't allowed like Malaysia. Given the choice between entertaining a crowd in a moderately revealing dress or entertaining nobody at all dressed as an extra from Millionaire Girls Gone Wild, Beyonce knows what she has to do. The Associated Press reports:
Beyonce Knowles has scrapped plans to stage her first concert in Malaysia… The announcement followed recent speculation that Knowles — who is famous for her sexy image and skimpy outfits — was reluctant to fulfil the Malaysian government's demand for female performers to cover up from the top of their chests to their knees, including their shoulders.Concert promoters have said Western performers face mounting pressure in Malaysia to keep skimpy clothes and steamy dance moves off the stage amid protests by conservative Muslims who believe liberal Western performances can corrupt young people.
Quite right Beyonce – you're not the world's most desirable woman because you know how to respect local customs, are you. Of course, the Malaysian government isn't without its point – surely everyone knows the famous 2004 scientific experiment where a normal young boy is shown a 20-second video of Beyonce wiggling her cleavage and instantly goes on the rampage, smashing windows, setting fire to things, trying to construct a crackpipe out of a hole-punch. And, more than this, by banning Beyonce from wearing skimpy outfits, Malaysia is effectively future-proofing itself; not just from the spread of evil western influences, but also it's now covered in case Rosie O'Donnell ever feels like doing a pan-Asian bikini tour any time soon. If only we'd have thought of it first.
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Christopher says
Beyonce is a jackass. She slapped Malaysian fans in the face because she couldn’t NOT dress like a whore for 2 hours ….and be PAID TO DO IT. THAT’S JUST LAME.
People out in Malaysia should probably not buy her music anymore. I just think, had she any class, she’d have covered up for the show and done something special for her fans to show them a little appreciation.
Oh, but she must be buying all her OWN records now, right? *Smirk*
Evisu says
Haha, that has to be one of the funniest blog subjects I have seen :). You crack me up!