We never knew there was so much money in looking miserable in photographs and deliberately misspelling the word 'Skater' – Avril Lavigne has apparently bought herself a 12,000 square foot house in Bel-Air for the sum of £4.8 million.
No, we're not sure where Avril Lavigne got all that cash either; it was a while since her last album and her husband hasn't had a hit song in years. Perhaps the world record for Shortest Amount Of Time That Hecklerspray Can Bear Hearing A Song Before Smashing Up The Radio With The Balls Of Their Feet now comes with a cash prize, because Avril Lavigne's godawful new single has beaten the previous holder to the prize by a good 3.8 seconds.
Avril Lavigne may appear to all and sundry to be the stupidest, least eloquent popstar in the world, but the girl must be doing something right – in Deryck Whibley, Avril Lavigne has got a real looker of a husb… no, that's not right. Maybe the way that Avril Lavigne shows alcoholic restraint? No, not that either. Oh well, at least Avril Lavigne has got a big house now – and that's sort of like not having a terrible personality isn't it? Sky reports on Avril Lavigne's new gaff:
The three-story, 12,000 square foot house is located in the posh LA neighbourhood of Bel-Air, the Los Angeles Times reports. Avril and her hubby, Sum 41 frontman Deryck Whibley, have reportedly paid £4.8 million for the home. The mansion also boasts an elevator, a sauna and spa, a pool, and garage space for 10 cars.
According to other reports, Avril Lavigne's new house also contains ten bathrooms, which means that Avril will never again be so full of liquid that she has to gush it over a passing photographer.
Sky also notes that Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whibley bought their house from Travis Barker and Shanna Moakler, and that's good for a couple of reasons. Since Sum 41 and Blink 182 were more or less the exact same band, Deryck and Avril will hardly need to redecorate and, secondly, perhaps the house will supply Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whibley with the same fate as Travis Barker and Shanna Moakler. Let's hope so, because we want Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whibley to split up, only for Avril Lavigne to possibly beat up Paris Hilton days later and then get back with Deryck Whibley long, long after everyone has stopped caring.
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Dan says
Quite possibly the least informed article I have ever heard in my life, and not because Im a fan of both artists but the fact that Avril and Deryck actually give a crap what some two bit journalist thinks about what they do.
Let me ask you if the number 26 million records sold rings a bell. Thats how many Avrils sold!
Ya people care about her you know…
Hardest working couple in Rock right there
Keep up what your doing you two, nothing wrong with doing things differently.
Avril Lavigne ROCKS
Sum 41 ROCKS
Ya!
Adam Gade says
Kudos to Dan for making a senseless acrostic. But seriously, I don’t know about, “may appear to all and sundry to be the stupidest, least eloquent popstar in the world”. Give credit to eral heavyweights like Paris Hilton and Sting.
johnner says
26 million records sold? Billions of cigarettes are sold every day,does that make them cool as well?
flierpa says
come on, this chick sucks harder than a crack whore’s vacuum cleaner.
Riskaka says
go Dan! and stuart.. fu -.-‘ flierpa, fu2.. johnner.. stfu, no one likes cigarettes for real, but a lot of people loves Avril and Sum 41
amanda says
i dont think avril la vigne shoul d be sued because; she has changed ALOT and she isnt that stupid to do something like that. I think everyone should just give her a break.
nina says
I LOVE AVRIL
irene says
avril lavigne’s house is perfect!sure and it cost much money but…it’s ok!is very big house and in rich area…!normous money i think!!
laura says
i think avril should beat up paris hilton… cos what is she famous for?
avril lavigne worked for her record deal…she worked to get famous… yet please… tell me… why is paris hilton famous?
she was a crap actress in the house of wax, and she isnt even pretty.
she dresses like a 14 year old and practically knows less than a 4 year old does. have you ever seen her in the simple life? you claim that avril is stupid and knows nothing, maybe you should take the piss out of paris, cos im sure she knows less.
avril got famous at a young age, give her some credit, if she wasnt any good she wouldnt have got the record deal and she wouldnt of created 3 albums.
cigerettes are not cool, but each to their own, if she wants to smoke them, she’ll smoke them, who are you to care? she’s still young, i say good on her for living her life to the full.
you’re just hell bent on ruining people and you’ll live to be a very hateful man. just leave her to it.
if you hate her so much why do you even bother wasting so much time on creating these posts?
get… a… life
The Truth says
Yah, go fuck yourself Stuart.
She’s got millions, you have nothing. Bitch.