Ellen DeGeneres made her American Idol debut last night, and she had some intimidatingly big shoes to fill.
Paula Abdul‘s shoes. On paper, Ellen DeGeneres and Paula Abdul couldn’t be any less alike – Ellen is intentionally funny, Paula is unintentionally funny; Ellen has hosted the Oscars, Paula has hosted a home shopping television show; Ellen loves women, Paula loves the pan-gender shrieking voices that live inside her head and force her to do terrible things – so was Ellen a worthy addition to the American Idol judging panel?
The word on the street is that she was. And also that she wasn’t. And that she tried too hard. And that she didn’t try hard enough. We hope that clears things up.
Ellen DeGeneres literally couldn’t have joined American Idol at a worse time. Sure, replacing Paula Abdul seems like it’d be easy enough – all you need to do is speak in full sentences and not dribble down your chin and you’d look like a pro in comparison – but Ellen isn’t just replacing Paula Abdul.
Because she’s started mid-season, Ellen is also replacing the litter of American Idol placeholder judges that came before her. Viewers wouldn’t just be comparing her to Abdul – they’d be seeing if she was as snippy as Katy Perry or as sexually predatory as Shania Twain or if she could impersonate a Goomba from the Super Mario Bros movie as well as Victoria Beckham.
Worse still, this is Simon Cowell‘s last year on American Idol, which means – depending on who his replacement is – Ellen DeGeneres could find herself being the only adult on the panel. So, on her debut last night, Ellen needed to be funny, sympathetic, insightful and forceful enough to stop American Idol from becoming the show about the fat man with the dog fixation and the world’s most pointless woman. So no pressure, then.
Could Ellen live up all these expectations? Let’s see what the internet thought:
VoteForTheWorst: “The first Hollywood episode was a bit underwhelming, because most of it was taken up by Ellen DeGeneres trying to be funny and failing miserably.”
MTV: “Though she got to sit down while the singers took the stage, DeGeneres made her presence felt, tossing off funny asides and coherent, helpful advice while flashing just enough of her signature wit to bring a fresh feeling to the judges’ panel.”
Billboard: “Ellen DeGeneres kicked off her debut as the new “American Idol” judge in impressive fashion on Tuesday night? (Feb. 9), bringing a healthy dose of honest critiques and well-timed punchlines to the first night of Hollywood auditions.”
So, based on our horribly skewed findings, Ellen DeGeneres was two parts funny to one part crap. But you know what? Let’s give Ellen DeGeneres a chance here. This is only her first go on American Idol – once the live shows crank into gear, Ellen will have time to settle into a groove. And don’t forget – if everyone is mean about Ellen DeGeneres, then maybe Victoria Beckham will take her job. Is that really something you want? Is it? Victoria Beckham? On American Idol? All the time? Is it? You sick bastards.
Moon says
WHy must Victoria Beckham?! Why don’t you guys say..”Ellen DeGeneris is no Mary J Blige”? Or..”Ellen DeGeneris is no Avril Lavinge”? Or..she is no Katy Perry? Or Shania Twain? Or whomever?
Let me tell you why..it’s because YOU HATE Victoria Beckham!! And you couldn’t help feeling scared that she will be in AI AGAIN sometimes in the future, if not this time, coz you VB is not bad at all! And because, as I said..you are a VB hater..and you LOVE to hate her and would stop at nothing to make other people hate her too even without reason!
Geez..you guys are PATHETIC!
tine says
thats awesome……I am SO calling her “Avril Lavinge” from now on…
Sunny says
I’m with Dave Della Terza, so far no big *Yay* for Ellen from the SunShine Ranchero.
The show’s last-gasp big hope lies in the producers forking up the $HoweverMillions to get Howard Stern. With the King of all Media who’d give a flying fig what sort of karaoke wannabes were on. Ratings would be mind-blowing.
Jamaicafest says
I thought that Ellen did quite well on her first time out.
JoeMomma says
“Ellen is intentionally funny, Paula is unintentionally funny”
I think that should of read
“Ellen tries to be intentionally funny, but falls flat to most people. The only people that think she’s funny are bi-curious Mid-American stay at home moms that watch her horrible show while eating christmas clearance choclate bon bons from Wal Mart.”
Matthew You Suck! :P
Ana says
I couldn’t agree more !
Posh Spice is not bad at all. She did a great job, and probably, will be back one time. Stop hating her, guys.
Name (required) says
of course the big corporate companies say degenerate is good, because she is a big hollywood name. if you ask real people, most will tell the truth which is she is: meh, all the way to: she sucks.
tedious says
I thought I was the only one who found Ellen tiresome. Her show is completely tedious, always the relentless selfpromotion. Audience participation crap, puleez, no more games and giveaways, mindless screaming middleclass women…. yeah yeah where’s the remote!