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Robert Downey Jr

Watch The Sherlock Holmes Trailer! Elementary, My Dear Watson!

by Alex de Moller

Robert Downey Jr. is Sherlock Holmes… Our inspectors are baffled by the mystery of it: somehow, our favourite Victorian hero was mistaken for Inspector Gadget. Guy Ritchie resurrects London’s drug-reliant super-detective and ditches his deerstalker hat for ninja skills and fruity dialogue. Accompanied by Watson (Jude Law), a plot involving the occult and other destructive [...]

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Robert Downey Jr Signs For The Disappointing Third Iron Man Film

by Stuart Heritage

Robert Downey Jr knows a good thing when he sees it – like handguns, lots of Class A drugs and movies directed by Guy Ritchie.

OK OK OK, so Robert Downey Jr doesn’t know a good thing when he sees it. Probably seven out of ten times he knows a good thing when actually he sees a rubbish thing. But Robert Downey Jr does know what things will make him richer than his wildest dreams, and he chases those things like a dog.

According to reports, Robert Downey Jr has signed a contract securing him to Iron Man 3 and an Avengers movie. This is particularly good news for anyone who, while enjoying the original Iron Man, really wants to see Iron Man get overtaken by an alien, grow an evil haircut and then dancing the Twist with Kirsten Dunst while cooking some eggs. For Superhero Law states that all of the above must happen in Iron Man 3.

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Tropic Thunder Beats The Dark Knight Thanks to Blacked-up Retards

by Ian Dransfield

Well it certainly took long enough but The Dark Knight has finally fallen, to the might of Tropic Thunder and its wall of controversy. While we all thought we would have to live in a world where no other films would ever get anywhere near The Dark Knight – a world where daily recitals of [...]

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Christian Bale Assault Charges Result in Ultimate Punishment. That, or Just a Caution

by Ian Dransfield

Christian Bale looks likely to get away with allegedly pushing his mum about, if he pleads guilty to assault. The Welshman, who no one seems to realise is Welsh, has been recommended to receive a caution by the Crown Prosecution Service for his alleged actions, should he plead guilty to charges next month. If, however, [...]

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Robert Downey Jr is Too Dumb to Understand The Dark Knight. His Words…

by Ian Dransfield

Robert Downey Jr was known for some things, then everyone forgot who he was, then they remembered again. And now that the people of the world once again recognise Robert Downey Jr in the street – and now that he’s likely off the smack and charlie – people are more likely to listen to him. [...]

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Robert Downey Jr To Star In Poo-Sounding Guy Ritchie Movie

by Stuart Heritage

So you’re Robert Downey Jr, perhaps the biggest movie star around right now. The world’s your oyster – so what’s your next move?

After the gigantic box office haul of Iron Man – one that’s likely to be repeated once Tropic Thunder is released later this summer – Robert Downey Jr can star in any movie he wants. But what movie has Robert Downey Jr decided to star in? A Sherlock Holmes movie, that’s what.

No, not the Sacha Baron Cohen/Will Ferrell Sherlock Holmes movie that was triumphantly announced earlier this week. Another Sherlock Holmes movie. A Sherlock Holmes movie where Sherlock Holmes is a musclebound action hero. A Sherlock Holmes movie where Sherlock Holmes is a musclebound action hero directed by Guy Ritchie. And there was us thinking that Robert Downey Jr had stopped taking drugs.

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Just Out of a Coma? Then Newsflash: Robert Downey Jr. Did Drugs

by hecklerspray staff

Life has been rough for Robert Downey, Jr, or ‘Downsey’ as he likes us to call him.

His life has been riddled with mistakes – drug abuse, incarceration, Gothika, public disgrace, dating Sarah Jessica Parker, singing a duet with Sting – and we’ve witnessed them all first hand.

So, for the first time ever since breakfast, Robert Downey Jr. openly talks about his past drug abuse, and does so with a nice vocabulary. He also talks about some other stuff, like a movie he’s in that’s coming out soon, or something.

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