Life has been rough for Robert Downey, Jr, or ‘Downsey’ as he likes us to call him.
His life has been riddled with mistakes – drug abuse, incarceration, Gothika, public disgrace, dating Sarah Jessica Parker, singing a duet with Sting – and we’ve witnessed them all first hand.
So, for the first time ever since breakfast, Robert Downey Jr. openly talks about his past drug abuse, and does so with a nice vocabulary. He also talks about some other stuff, like a movie he’s in that’s coming out soon, or something.
Unless you’ve been trapped under a rock for the past ten years or so and just recently gnawed through your arm to become free, it’s no surprise to you that Robert Downey Jr. has been quite the drug abuser in the past.
Yeah, we know. But Robert Downey Jr. has chosen to tell us all about it for the trillionth time. We’ll listen because his dreamy, slightly burgeoning-y eyes captivate us every time, but he’d better check off another item on the celebrity scavenger hunt list soon, like join the celebrity DUI club. If he acts now, he can get the custom racial slur rant as a joining bonus.
Anyway, Robert Downey Jr. prattled on to PARADE magazine about how he did drugs for the first time when he was eight with his dad, dropped out of high school, and became wrapped up in the Hollywood shenanigans and drug abuse that it ultimately led to the demise of his seven year relationship with Sarah Jessica Parker. What the…? Why does the Mr. Ed theme music come on out of nowhere whenever her name comes up? Spooky. Anyway, let’s hear it straight form RDJ himself:
“I was so selfish,” he admits. “I liked to drink, and I had a drug problem, and that didn’t jibe with Sarah Jessica, because it is the furthest thing from what she is… I had very much this post-adolescent, faux nihilistic, punk-rock rebellious attitude. I thought my way was so much cooler than people who were actually building lives and careers. I was in love with Sarah Jessica and love clearly was not enough. I was meant to move on. And, after some heartache, she was meant to find her home with a great star.”
Um, yeah she did! She married Ferris Bueller, sucka! Robert Downey Jr. also talks about his career, and such:
“I went after Iron Man because Keanu Reeves got The Matrix, and Johnny Depp got Pirates,” he says. “I’m looking at all these posters of the movies I’ve seen with my son, and I’m thinking, ‘Damn! I could do that!’ “
However, the search for a decent script about a drunk, wobbly pirate who rebels against sentient machines to release the minds of humanity was more difficult than anticipated, so Robert Downey Jr took up the role as a Marvel Comics superhero in the upcoming movie released next month, Iron Man.
We’re very excited for our friend’s return to sobriety, and eagerly anticipate Iron Man despite the face that every third person we come across mumbly sings Black Sabbath’s Iron Man, but of course only knows a few words so its always Now the time is near du-du-du-du-du-du-du-nuh-nuh-nuh.
That’s okay. We’ll just think about Sarah Jessica Parker and the Mr. Ed music will drown them out.
Read more:
Robert Downey Jr. On Dating Sarah Jessica Parker, Parenting And Drug Use – Huffington Post