Here’s a guest blog by Josh from the mighty Interestment…

Beauty surely is the most fickle of the tick box categories we demand in a partner. After all, every once in a while a gorgeous face will start speaking, and all semblence of attractiveness will find itself hurtling from the nearest window.

Here are ten famous people who would be wise to keep schtum in future.
1. Kimberley Walsh

As a non-red-headed member of Girls Aloud, Kimberley has done a great job of sticking to various diets to keep her attractiveness intact. She has fine ironed hair, a taut, impressive body, but when she opens her mouth it’s as if some lunatic is going berserk on a the lower notes of a Moog keyboard. She needs to keep it zipped.

2. David Beckham

Just when everyone thought Beckham had it all – the great tattoos, all the best haircuts, footie skills, a nice face – he opened his mouth and out came the voice of a confused mouse stuck in a lift. Thank you, Christ.

3. James Blunt

James Blunt divides the nation – one half wants to bludgeon to death with a brick, the other half wants to use lead piping. Either way, his songs really are awful, but eight hours of You’re Beautiful on loop would be preferable to thirty seconds of listening to his horrible plummy speaking voice. He makes the Queen sound like Jordan.

4. Russell Brand

Russell’s act revolves around telling boring stories about his life in the style of a minor character from Oliver Twist. It’s literally as unfunny as it sounds. Needs to put one of them delicious Mrs Miggins pies in ‘is cake’ole. The twat.

5. Esther Rantzen

After years of broadcasting on television, notably on sideways-glancing shows like That’s Life, Rantzen still hasn’t mastered the art of speaking through just her mouth. At least half of her words come from her nose. Unlistenable.

6. Lily Allen

The main problem facing Allen is that once she decides to speak, the pretend voice she uses to sing with becomes worryingly exposed. Why is such a well spoken young thing attempting to sound like a plumber’s wife?

7. Tom Cruise

The main argument for Cruise to put a sock in it comes from hearing his strange talk of how he’s probably the new Jesus, always accompanied by a hollow glare and threats about putting ruthless ethics into people. What the hell does that even mean, you maniac?

8. Michael Jackson

Of course, now that he’s going to perform again, everyone has forgotten that Michael Jackson is the sinister voice of a frightened child trapped in a terrifying clown body. It’s only a matter of time before he looks to the nearest camera whispering “help me” over and over again until we all start crying.

9. Kelly Brook

The story of Kelly is a very sad one. Blessed with outrageous curves, a wonderful face, and impressive flowing locks, she was cursed with the voice of a cretin, and the inability to remember more than one fact at a time. Depressing.

10. Paula Abdul

A random word generator, it’s a mystery how Abdul keeps her job. Perhaps it’s because… we can… erm… feel her… heart… whenever she… gives of herself… the world…

And we’re out of time.

The above was written by Josh Burt of Interestment.co.uk. It is good and he is good and so say all of us.

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The recent Adidas commercial works a bit like a sort of celebrity IQ test – an endless parade of famous people flash before you, and you have to name as many as you can.

How many can you get? We saw Estelle and Run DMC and David Beckham and The Ting Tings and former Antiques Roadshow presenter Hugh Scully and Bod and the Archangel Gabriel and Brian May from Queen and famous Australian moth Xylorycta Assimilis. Can you do better? Doubtful.

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9 - Yet more evidence of why Yahoo Answers is the best website on the planet – Image

8 - How much money did Madonna make last year? An OBSCENE amount, that’s how much – Billboard

7 - Want to see a picture of David Beckham getting choked? OK! – Popsugar

6 - Just what the world needs: a chocolate shortage – ABC

5 - Creepy creepy creepy toys – io9

4 – OCTOPUS WITH A JAR! – I Am Bored

3 - Quiz: can you recognise companies by their logos? Yes you can, but you sure will feel dirty afterwards – Sporcle

2 - The Simpsons title sequence has changed, so we’ll all be able to know instantly whether we’re about to watch a good old episode or a crappy new one - YouTube

1 - Australia seems surprised that this has become a hit on YouTube – News

David likes to try stringing simple sentences together so that nobody confuses with a messed-up character from The Wizard Of Oz. Victoria, meanwhile, hones in on any nearby cameras so that the paparazzi can take another photo of her pulling a face like of a cow that’s just had a hand shoved up its arse.

Thai monks, on the other hand, do nothing all day apart from being at one with the planet and acting extremely hard. One thing that does nark them off, though, is when animals and insects are innocently killed, possibly with the bug zappers that David and Victoria Beckham have just installed in their Thai home. Whoops.

Through hazy personal experience, we can confirm that Thailand is slightly warmer then the UK. Snow doesn’t mess everything in Thailand like in the UK; instead that privilege is reserved for the occasional mosquito that drowns in your beer. And they carry diseases as well which can be a bit of a pain in the arse. Naturally, a kind source for the Beckhams said:

“The Beckhams were very keen to keep the mosquitoes out because they can carry disease, as well as being annoying.”

A spokesperson for the entire population of Thai monks responded by saying:

“The Thai people are very keen to keep the Beckhams out because they offer nothing of value, as well as being annoying.”

It must a strange situation for David and Victoria to be in. Most of the time, they have to simply snap their fingers and a slave will bring them a freshly grilled squirrel that’s been stuffed with peppers. Sadly for them, the Thai monks aren’t really that bothered who turns up. Mess with their culture and it’s a different kettle of onions!

The chances of the Beckhams being able to kickbox their way out of a potential fight with a beefed-up Thai man is quite slim. However, we believe that there is a solution to every problem. And the answer to this conundrum lies with the overly exposed and exploited Beckham children.

After giving their children such stupid names, surely the monks will take pity on the couple and take them in as one of their own. At least then they won’t bother anyone else when they turn 18 and get caught in a public toilet expose.

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That’s the sorry lesson learnt by Eric and June Emmett, two of the human beings that David and Victoria Beckham employ as house slaves. According to reports, the Emmetts have been taken into custody for allegedly half-inching property belonging to the Beckhams and selling it on eBay.

It just goes to show that when you’re as famous as the Beckhams are, you can’t trust anyone – not even your own staff. It’s not so much the fact that the Emmetts allegedly stole football shirts and designer dresses that upset the Beckhams but, now that the household copy of The Little Red Hen Goes To Town has been swiped, David’s reading ability is bound to be set back weeks, if not months.

Everyone steals things. Maybe it’s sweets, maybe it’s ideas, maybe it’s top secret government documents, but everyone definitely has at one point or another stolen something. Us? We’ve got a nice little stationery-stealing racket going. Unfortunately, we only steal when we’re working from home, which means we’re basically just stealing from ourselves. Conversely, we’re going to give ourselves a final written notice if we ever catch ourselves doing it again, so we have to do it carefully when we’re not looking.

Anyway, if you were working for David and Victoria Beckham, you’d definitely steal something from them, wouldn’t you? They both earn enough to be able to replace whatever trinkets you took, and their home contents are bound to be covered by plenty of insurance. No, you’d definitely steal from David and Victoria Beckham. But you wouldn’t put the stolen goods on eBay where everyone can see them. Only the worst kind of dribble-skulled, honking dimwit would think about doing something as obviously stupid as that.

So let’s introduce you to Eric and June Emmett, two of the Beckhams’ servants who allegedly stole their stuff and sold it on eBay. E! Online reports:

Per U.K. reports, the purported thieves, 55-year-old Eric Emmett and his 56-year-old wife, June, have been working at the $22 million “Beckhingham Palace” for more a decade. The staffers supposedly swiped soccer jerseys and boots belonging to Becks, as well as designer dresses worn by the erstwhile Posh Spice. The memorabilia was then put up for sale on the auction site, raking in thousands of dollars.

According to reports, David and Victoria Beckham only got wise to this alleged pilfering when Victoria Beckham’s parents saw the items on eBay being sold by a seller called Posh & Becks.

The Emmetts deny all charges but, just to reiterate, they’re accused of stealing valuable and sentimental items from the home of David and Victoria Beckham and not just selling them on eBay where it’s easy to trace the seller, but selling them under the one name that anybody associated with the Beckhams would search eBay for if they were looking for stolen Beckham goods.

No wonder David and Victoria Beckham don’t want to employ the Emmetts any longer. It’s not because they’ve destroyed the bond of trust that exists between servant and master, but because – if these charges are true – it sounds like they’re so stupid that it’s only a matter of time before they take Romeo’s eye out with a strimmer.

More then likely because it’s not real.

But for once we have to hold our massive hands up and admit that someone does actually know where the sodding place is. Would you believe it, the person in question is the most unlikely of sources; none other then publicity-seeking semi-celebrity and occasional footballer David Beckham.

Perhaps he stumbled on the Street after getting lost on his journey back from training to his fifty-seven bathroomed mansion. You do have to feel sorry for the poor kid, seeing as he has probably just learned the difference between left and right.

The new football season is yet to kick off, meaning it must be the kind of time when all professionals in the game are looking for something to do – if it isn’t polishing up on their roasting skills, then its whoring yourself out for bread-based rewards.

So what are the UK’s finest footballing export and pointless wife thinking of doing to dominate every media opportunity available? Clashing our heads together, we’ve come to realise that the only realistic TV appearances Becks could make would be for his personal mental development – a journey of educational discover in one of America’s fine learning institutions. But which one?

Let’s face it; do you really think that he could turn up to some fancy looking high school like in One Tree Hill without looking out of place? No. In fact, the only place he could squeeze in and almost look like he fit in would be at Bayside High with AC Slater and the gang, as David donned Lycra to try out for the homoerotic wrestling team. Though that’s not really an option now, with most of the Saved By The Bell cast (read: Screech) off doing porn and things.

No, the typical American school (off of TV) is no place for thirty three-year-old bloke with such a hectic lifestyle. As we all know, he’s too busy when he isn’t playing football, looking after his wife and pretending to care about her latest trauma when she doesn’t get the latest pair of six inch Jimmy Choo heels in custard yellow.

So what is the best alternative place of learning for an American? If you haven’t realised already, it’s Sesame Street. The show has been running for thirty nine series and is still going strong – though sadly for the UK, we never recieved the full benefit of the program like our American counterparts, with the show ceasing to be aired in favour of The Hoobs. Strangely though, despite their extra years of education, our friends across the pond still sometimes come across as a bit slow.

Show bosses have picked up on David Beckham’s fascination with Sesame Street, and though there is the distinct possibility that his young children know better than daddy does that Bert, Ernie, Big Bird and Elmo aren’t actually real, we aren’t about to ruin the illusion. After all, we don’t want tears before the bedtime milk and cookies are served. A source told Closer magazine:

“David has always been a huge fan. When he was a kid he watched it and knew all the characters.”

See! He knows all the characters! All of the people who said that a bag of spanners were more intelligent than David Beckham can just leave the building now.

So what’s he actually going to be doing? Because the show is educational and all that, there isn’t going to be a special football-based version of the programme with David demonstrating his flicks, kicks and other fancy tricks. Closer again informs us that he’ll:

“Teach Elmo how to spell his favourite word. And you never guess what it is! Not posh, foot or ball – it’s persistent.”

Persistent? We thought that ‘ball’ or ‘goal’ would be obvious, but persistent? Could that be used in a sentence commonly uttered by Becks? “My wife is persistent in grabbing limelight for herself” or “My wife is persistent in her quest to not just be written off as a footnote in the history of celebrity.”

Besides, we thought Elmo’s favourite word would be hamburger. You learn something every day it seems.

Which is exactly what ol’ D-O-double G Snoop Dogg has gone and done. Or, more accurately – has gone and not done.

It’s a given that normally you can rely on the Dizzle to carry a baton through customs, get arrested for carrying a gun and some naughty substances around in his car or simply to get banned from a country.

But oh no, not this time. He has to go and be all ‘not arrested’ and stuff.

Maybe Snoop really has decided that he should have a cleaner image than that he has portrayed for so many years. His apparent partnership with David Beckham was intended to save the universe, after all. The universe in California, at least. Through the power of football.

Hmm. At least he’s trying, eh?

As if to add credibility to his claims that he is a changed man, Snoop Dogg was recently not arrested – you read that right, he was absolutely not arrested – on drug possession charges. While out on tour with his posse, Snoop’s tour bus was pulled over by the federals for having an expired registration sticker. What followed was nothing short of a miracle.

Rather than, as we would expect, the police entering the vehicle, having a slight altercation, then leaving with the Doggyizzleshizzle in handcuffs, they left with two completely different people. Checks were made and it turned out that neither of them were Snoop in disguise – in fact, neither of them even had names that sounded like Snoop.

While it was adjudged to be a mistake initially, it soon transpired that the police involved in the arrests had not made a mistake, and for probably the first time in his life Snoop Dogg had managed to escape arrest through the benefit of not having committed any crime.

Wonders in this world never cease.

No, far from the story that has been written approximately once every week and a half for the last 20 years – ‘Snoop Dogg Arrested For [inset crime here]‘ – Ethan Calhoun and Kevin Barkey are the names on the lips of the police and all reporters. Unfortunately, no one knows who they actually are, bar their names and the fact that they were part of Snoop’s posse. As a result, all headlines still refer to Snoop Dogg’s involvement.

It’s a funny old world.

Hopefully this slight deviation won’t become common practice for the lanky raptist (that’s ‘rap artist’, for those wondering) and he can soon return to his usual ways of doing something stupid, getting arrested, saying ‘izzle’ on the end of words in a irritating fashion, doing another stupid thing, getting arrested again and so on and so forth. Otherwise we’re going to have to start getting used to him being an ‘innocent bystander’.

Frankly, that just doesn’t fit.

But these days it looks as if Sesame Street’s standards have slipped a little. Previous Sesame Street guests have included Maya Angelou, Buzz Aldrin, Lou Rawls, BB King and one of Cheech And Chong. But who’s the latest celebrity name to hit Sesame Street? Noted intellectual David Beckham, that’s who.

However, as weird as it may seem for David Beckham to appear on Sesame Street, we’re sure that mixing Beckham together with toddlers and gonkish puppets will only yield positive results. Who knows, David Beckham might even learn how to count up to six if he concentrates hard enough.

David Beckham must be a bit of a loose end over in America, which isn’t surprising given that his move there was a bit of a horrible failure. Although David Beckham’s move to LA Galaxy was greeted with the kind of fanfares and creepy waxwork representations that Americans do so well, it’s all fallen on its arse a bit since then.

Plagued by injury, David Beckham’s US move meant that he didn’t single-handedly make Americans like football or even help his team do very well in its league like he was supposed to, plus Victoria Beckham’s dreams of becoming an American TV star have died a soggy death. Worse still, the Beckhams made friends with Tom Cruise, which means they probably now spend over eight hours a day just idly thinking about Tom Cruise’s incredible arse.

However, things aren’t all bad for David Beckham because a) he earns more money in a second than every generation of your family past and future put together will ever earn, and b) he’s filmed an appearance on Sesame Street. The Sun reports:

A source said: “David has always been a huge fan of the show. When he was a kid he watched it, like a lot of people, and knew all the characters. He was more than happy to go on. He loves dealing with kids and thought it would be a great way to get through to them. He has developed a great understanding speaking to children with his own boys and through his coaching at the Beckham soccer schools. He had a great time filming it, a real laugh.”

David Beckham chose to talk about the word ‘persistance’, by the way, because it’s the word that means the most to him, and also because ’systematically avoiding any mention of Rebecca Loos in public’ isn’t really a word.

Anyway, a Sesame Street appearance can really change the public’s perception of a celebrity – from Robert DeNiro puncturing his self-importance by barking like a dog to James Blunt showing he’s capable of self-deprecation by singing a song called My Triangle to Stevie Wonder making the best piece of television ever.

So we’re sure that David Beckham’s Sesame Street appearance went perfectly and will do wonders for his image. Plus David’s probably a natural around muppets – he’s been married to one for the last nine years, after all.

Thank you, we’re here all week. Try the veal.

Read more:

Becks And The Cute Redhead – The Sun

In the case of Michael Jackson, he went from black to white overnight. Other people like Puff Daddy change their name to even stranger things like P Diddy. And now another idiot is going to do the same given the advice from another moron.

Say hello to D-Beck, courtesy of Snoop Dogg. 

As we’ve been told before, it’s not a good idea to piss off a bunch of rock hard gangsters. Soon, we could be literally swimming with the fishes, the shopping trolleys and the other rubbish that gets thrown in to the sea. Though to be fair, could you really see someone like David Beckham – sorry, D-Beck – taking us out in some sort of hit? No neither can we.

Any sort of sane person would never give a man with the brain the size of pea a weapon capable of inflicting damage on people. More than likely he’ll be allowed to play gangsters as a reward for not bruising his thigh and being sidelined for eight months while pocketing thousands of dollars a week in LA for playing a sport that's as important to Americans as salad. We’re quite sure that D-Beck will be quite happy playing with a potato gun to shoot all the rival imaginary mafia drug lords. It’ll be the closest thing he’ll ever come to popping a cap in someone’s ass.

So what’s came over our cherished English rose? Usually David Beckham only needs to change his haircut and everyone goes loopy. But not this time. It seems that D-Beck has been hanging out with some unsavoury characters who are luring him down the path of oversized jewellery and hos. But who could this rascal be? Why it’s everyone’s favourite animal named rapper Snoop Doggy Dogg. 

Everyone knows about Snoop Dogg. Unfortunately a little bit too much. From trying to take weapons on planes and then not being able to understand why, this role model for all children loves a quick toke on the old cannabis stick whilst being arrested for various illegal activities. We’re sure it won’t be to long and he’ll be locked up alongside fellow rap stars Foxy Brown and The Game. A rapper in trouble! There’s a rare occurrence. 

Snoop and Beckham go way back, but now David's on Snoop's turf, he has to play by Snoop's rules. And those rules include giving himself a silly name. According to The Sun: 

“Snoop thought the name David was a bit boring, and he wasn’t too impressed by Becks either.” 

Despite his name now sounding like a new brand of Becks lager, Posh is reported to like his new christened name, giving her another nickname for her husband to memorise, alongside 'Golden Balls', 'Moronic' and 'The Sole Reason Why I’m Famous.'  

God only knows what’s next for our favourite exported footballer. But when the D-Beck sing-a-long rap album comes out, then we’ll be worried. We won’t know whether to laugh or cry. More than likely though, it’ll be laughter. 

Read more:

Rap fave D Beck gets respec' – The Sun

Let's face it: that's going to be a tall order. After countless years of inspiring legions of lower middle class Colchester teenagers to believe that smoking the odd joint makes them 'street' and that their 10-year-old Vauxhall Nova is actually some sort of pimpmobile, it's a long rocky road to salvation he faces.

So who has he dragged in to help? Which brain-bulging luminary has old Dogg decided will provide him with the best chance to turn his life around?

David Beckham, that's who.

Apparently Snoop and Becks are teaming up to help 'save lives' in California's poorest and most crime-ridden areas. Ignoring the most obvious way to achieve this – by strapping on those Batman and Robin costumes and launching their own brand of vigilante justice – they reckon that the way to cure the ghetto's laundry list of social ills is to introduce kids to 'soccer and American football'.

Snoop explained:

"We're going to be trying to save lives. We will be going in to do different things and I hope someone cares. I hope this proves I do other things than go to jail, smoke weed and go back to jail. With me, the media is usually most concerned with conflicts and altercations."

Now, hecklerspray can't really fault the motivation behind all of this. Seems that both celebs genuinely want to make a social difference. But Christ, trying to tackle a culture of violence by introducing kids to football – a game played entirely by Neanderthal cretins – is like trying to discourage obesity by hurling KFC Buckets into the Magic Numbers' dressing room.

Oh well. At least their hearts are in the right place, even if their sense of logic or reason isn't. And hopefully the scheme will be more successful than that time hecklerspray boldly wandered through Brixton with an Atmosfear board game hoping to discourage the locals from a life of crime by introducing them to the majesty of The Gatekeeper.

We never did get that dice back.

Read More:

Snoop Dogg To 'Save Lives' With Beckham – FemaleFirst

Because that's what Victoria Beckham has done, and it's got her into Barbara Walters' prestigious 10 Most Fascinating People Of The Year list. Although her complete failure to establish herself as an actress or presenter on American TV might make it look as if Victoria Beckham has had a massively depressing year, at least the inclusion on Barbara Walters' fascinating list means it hasn't been a total disaster. And we're so happy for her that we're willing to overlook the fact that Barbara Walters calling Victoria Beckham fascinating is basically an admission that 2007 was so drearily unfascinating that everyone might as just suffocate themselves to death in their sleep tonight.

You know who one of the most fascinating people of the year was? Rosie O'Donnell, that's who. Lovely old angry Rosie O'Donnell with her Donald Trump fights and her Elisabeth Hasselbeck fights and her leaving The View and her subsequently not getting any other television jobs because everyone mostly thinks she's an overdemanding, unstable firebrand. That behaviour is almost the dictionary definition of fascinating.

However, you won't find Rosie O'Donnell on Barbara Walters' list of the 10 Most Fascinating People Of The Year. That could be because Barbara Walters used to be Rosie's boss on The View and their interview would be uncomfortable and awkward, or it could be that Barbara Walters really believes that a wooden, past-his-best footballer and a washed-up singer with a speaking voice that's part dentist drill and part hairdresser falling down a lift-shaft are actually more fascinating.

Barbara Walters has unveiled her list of the 10 Most Fascinating People Of The Year and, for some reason that we still can't understand, David and Victoria Beckham have come out on top.

That's not to say that David and Victoria Beckham aren't fascinating – although by going to live in America in a blaze of moviestar-endorsed publicity then singularly failing to either a) justify David's multi-million dollar salary by not even getting his team into the top half of its league or b) do anything more interesting that get followed around by some pigs at speed, it technically means that the Beckhams are fascinating in the same way that your cat finds dead frogs fascinating.

But this is Barbara Walters' list, not ours, so we'll just relay why Victoria Beckham thinks her marriage to David is so fascinating:

"I think it's where sports meets fashion meets music, and I think that's probably what people find interesting."

Yes, on reflection this whole 'sports meets fashion meets music' idea of Victoria Beckham's probably is what makes them fascinating. We were wrong to think it was because all the thundering vapidity that surrounds the Beckhams is sort of funny. Apologies all round.

But this is Barbara Walters' 10 Most Fascinating People Of The Year list, not Barbara Walters' Two People Who Barely Count As One Normal Person's Idea Of Fascinating list, so who else did Walters pick this year? In no particular order, they are:

Justin Timberlake – Fascinating because: he brought sexy back. Single-handedly. Even though he's got a girl's voice.

The MySpace Founders – Fascinating because: of the way they're crapping it about Facebook.

Katherine Heigl – Fascinating because: she was a doctor on the telly and then a woman in a film.

Jennifer Hudson – Fascinating because: she was the only person to win an Oscar this year.

Don Imus – Fascinating because: scientists managed to genetically clone his facial skin to use as a material that can stretch across the top of space shuttles to stop them burning up on re-entry.

Bill Clinton – Fascinating because: he's the least-convincing Carmela Soprano ever.

Hugo Chavez – Fascinating because: his CD, Hugo Chavez Sings The Soundtrack To Cannonball Run 2, has been top of every single music chart in the world since January 1.

Read more:

The 10 Most Fascinating People Of 2007 – ABC 

Most people would have expected David Beckham to know this more than anyone, because his neighbour is Tom Cruise. However, in a new interview David Beckham has gone to huge lengths to make it clear that Tom Cruise absolutely doesn't shove his Scientology beliefs down David Beckham's throat and, although David Beckham respects Tom Cruise's religion, neither Tom Cruise or Katie Holmes have ever tried to force him into Scientology. Unless you'd count burning the phrase 'JOIN US' in giant letters onto David Beckham's lawn as 'forcing', of course. Which we're legally entitled to point out is something that Tom Cruise has never done, by the way, although he might want to think about it if he's serious about getting David Beckham to join this Scientology lark.

Of all the unlikely friendships we've ever encountered, the relationship between Tom Cruise and David Beckham must rank as one of the weirdest. Something tells us that David Beckham's sparkling wit wasn't what made Tom Cruise decide to introduce him to baby Suri, and David didn't rush to Los Angeles at Tom Cruise's behest for the down-to-earth normality his new friend would provide. So what is it? Some have suggested that Tom Cruise and David Beckham were able to bond because they're both insanely wealthy publicity magnets, while others have guessed that Victoria Beckham and Katie Holmes are the real friends and that Tom and David are merely a by-product of that.

And then there's Scientology. As the Jesus of Scientology, people expect that Tom Cruise has a responsibility to recruit as many high-profile names to the religion as he can. If this is the case, then there aren't many bigger figures globally than David Beckham. And you could argue that if Tom Cruise ever managed to recruit David Beckham to Scientology then the religion would be swamped by millions of youngsters who idolise Beckham enough to follow his every move, even the one that charges them thousands of dollars to believe stories about alien souls getting dropped into volcanoes. It'd also explain why Tom Cruise threw a party for David Beckham on his arrival to Los Angeles and why he also wants them to hook up for some fun soon.

But, in a staggering turn of events, David Beckham has said that Tom Cruise has never tried to make him join Scientology at all. David told Arena:

"We respect their religion. We respect everything they do and believe in. But they have never turned around to us and said, 'You have to be a part of this', because that's not what they're about. It's never been about that. There's been nothing shoved down our throats because friends don't do things like that. They are amazing people who are just so positive about life and they have been great to us."

 That means… that means David Beckham and Tom Cruise are friends with each other because they simply enjoy each other's company? Ugh, that's weirder than the religion thing.

Read more:

David Beckham's Respect For Scientology – Mirror