It’s been a long time coming, but LeAnn Rimes has finally started acting like a genuine country singer.
Unless she hasn’t. Basically it’s been reported that LeAnn Rimes had cheated on her husband with Eddie Cibrian, her co-star in a forthcoming TV movie. Which isn’t really news, since people we don’t care about presumably cheat on their partners with people we’ve never heard of every day.
Anyway, while Eddie Cibrian has denied the affair, LeAnn Rimes has been a little less forthcoming. You know what this means? LeAnn Rimes totally raped Eddie Cibrian in his sleep! Unless she didn’t.
It’s difficult to think of LeAnn Rimes as a country singer, isn’t it? True, she may have ticked most of the appropriate boxes – she sings country music, she’s from the south of America and she has a woefully misspelt name – but there was just one thing stopping us from taking LeAnn Rimes seriously: a hopelessly messed-up personal life.
Having a hopelessly messed-up personal life is rule number one of being a country singer. Until you’ve developed an alcohol dependency, got married to a man who’s been arrested for child abuse or literally shot a stranger in the face, you can’t join the club. And it looks like LeAnn Rimes might have just joined the club.
Even though nobody has seen, heard or even thought of her once in the last decade, LeAnn Rimes is apparently making a TV movie at the moment called Northern Lights. We don’t know what it’s about, and we don’t feel like we have to find out because we’re not going to watch it, you’re not going to watch it and the only people who are going to watch it will be Alzheimer’s sufferers who can’t find their remote control and they’ll forget it ever existed the moment it finishes, so it doesn’t matter.
However, we’d guess that Northern Lights is either very sexy or very boring, because it’s been reported that it pushed LeAnn Rimes into having a passionate affair with her co-star Eddie Cibrian. Unless it didn’t – here’s what Cibrian had to say about it:
?Other than being friends and two actors who were romantically intertwined in a movie-for-television we filmed last fall, there is no truth to the reporting… It is a fabricated story that is using random snapshots as connective tissue to create a scandalous relationship.?
And this hardline denial was backed up by LeAnn Rimes in a blog post yesterday:
?This is a difficult time for me and my loved ones. But I appreciate all your continued support. I would like to assure all of you that this is a place for you to hear things directly from me and as you all know, not everything in our lives is black and white.?
Wait, that’s not a firm denial at all. If anything, it seems like LeAnn Rimes is being deliberately evasive about it all. So what’s going on? Did LeAnn Rimes and Eddie Cibrian have an affair or not?
The answer is: we don’t care. It’s LeAnn Rimes, for God’s sake. We’d rather not waste time remembering that she even exists. We’re not mental.
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Joke Police says
Eddie Cibrian was in Sunset Beach. Quite a catch.
Sarah says
from the south of America? ah man, that sounds clunky.
Joke Police says
I don’t know about the south of America. I do know about sadly-ignored, ahead-of-their-time, genius surrealist soap satires though.