5 Reasons Why Halle Berry Can’t Keep A Man

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Halle Berry hot Halle Berry is possibly one of, if not the most beautiful woman on the planet. She managed to be named Esquire magazine’s “Sexiest Woman Alive” even at age 42 and after just having had a child. If that’s not timeless beauty, I don’t know what is.

Not only that, she also is one of the most talented women in Hollywood. She has an Emmy, Golden Globe, SAG, NAACP Image Award, and was the first and only woman of African American descent to win an Academy Award for Best Actress.

Yet, somehow, despite all of this, she can’t seem to keep a man. Neither marriage papers nor a child can prevent the men in her life from running the hell away. But why?

Her name is synonymous with sex appeal, she’s accomplished at her craft, and who wouldn’t want to call a bond girl their own?

While some might attribute it to men who are intimidated by successful women, every guy who has left her was not meeting her at a rags-to-riches transition. These men met her when she was already The Halle Berry.

I guess that leads us to ask: Who is Halle Berry, and what the hell is wrong with her?

More often than not, the simplest answer is the right one. Therefore, if I were forced to make a snap judgment on what the underlying issue might be, I’d have to go with the simple scientific fact that hot girls are crazy.

In fact, usually the hotter a girl is, the crazier she is; there’s no stronger positive correlation in nature than that.

So, while I think everyone knows she’s probably crazy, I’d offer that so are all chicks, it’s just at different levels. So what levels, or rather what kinds of crazy is Halle Berry?

Let us count the ways:

Attention Seeking

halle berry see through elie saab dress

Either her stylist hates her or she’s on some next level shit with trying to drum up attention.

If you think Lady Gaga’s meat suit or egg entrance is the extreme one has to go to in order to be considered straight jacket worthy, or at least off your list of eligible women, then you just don’t understand what sneaky crazy can do to you.

At least you know to stay away from Gaga and her wig collection; there’s no temptation. When it comes to Berry, you are hypnotized, drawn in by her rack so much that you don’t hear the door locking behind you, and boom—you’re stuck in her dungeon of crazy.

Some of the world’s brightest and most beautiful animals are the deadliest ones. A see-through dress isn’t an accident—it’s instinct.

Possessive

Halle Berry choker

Rumors have it that Berry hired private investigators to follow the father of her child, Gabriel Aubry, around. Although they weren’t exactly trying to work things out, they were trying to stay friendly as possible for Nahla’s sake. (read: She wanted to control Aubry even though they weren’t together.)

As it turns out, she didn’t really need it because he took Kim Kardashian to a Lakers game, which means they were followed by every tipped off pap in town. But hey, any investment in stalking is money well spent when you’re bat shit crazy, right?

In an even more over-the-top move, Berry showcased her controlling by insisting she be able to move her child to France, which most sane people understand is a far plane ride away from where Aubry lives in LA. You know, the father of the child with visitation rights? Ya.

Apparently crazy clouds one’s ability to understand geography. Or other people’s needs.

Insecure

halle berry insecure

When someone is this crazy, it can only go one of two ways: She’s a freak or she’s a starfish.

Anyone with those looks should be able to hold onto a man… provided they can back those looks up with something.

No man loses interest in a woman who knows how to put it down. She can be as crazy as it gets and they’ll put up with it because they know they’ll never get anything that hot and saner. They might find a freak, but that kind of crazy risks your penis being cut off in the middle of the night. If you’re up for it, then proceed with caution.

The matter of the fact is that men don’t marry magazines, so if she’s only good to look at, then what’s a perfect body worth? A dime that requires all the lights be out, insists on missionary, and sets a timer isn’t a dime at all. It’s an ex.

Drama Queen

Halle Berry undressed

Berry came out and said she had considered committing suicide after her first divorce, which was to Baseball player David Justice.

Um, Halle? You’re a movie star who is married to an athlete. I mean, what did you think was going to happen? Ever-wedded bliss?

And really? You were reeeeaaallly going to kill yourself because it didn’t work out? Life is over because a man rejected you? That’s high school emo B.S. right there.

Yells at mom: I HATE YOU. I’M GOING TO KILL MYSELF, THEN HOW WILL YOU FEEL? ::goes upstairs, feels sorry for self, comes back down for dinner::

I’ll note that I don’t take suicide threats or attempts lightly and don’t think anyone else should either.

I do, however, think her “confession” that she was going to gas herself is based around a crazy ass drama in her head that was never was going to play out. She sat and thought about how upset everyone would be and then felt better, end of story.

Real people are dealing with real suicidal thoughts and battling their own demons and she drops the story like a drama bomb while doing some self-promotion. She didn’t come out with the story with a philanthropic end in mind. She wasn’t reaching out to help at-risk women or youths, but instead she used it to get sympathy. And you know what’s craziest about that? She doesn’t even see it.

Straight. Up. Crazy.

halle berry crazy

I could have started and ended the whole investigation with this one simple fact: Halle Berry is a vegetarian… or maybe a vegan… or whatever it is that high-maintenance girls call themselves when they want to have a reason for constantly being on a diet.

The fact of the matter is that I don’t care because whichever she is screams crazy.

Before people start chiming in with some nonsense about her being diagnosed with type 2 diabetes or whatever her PR reason for her change of diet is, let me remind you that animal products did not do that to her. However, the fact she attributed it to that and made the irrational and, in my opinion, terrible decision to cut deliciousness out of her life entirely is more than enough evidence to prove she is DEFCON 1 kinda crazy.

Oh, but I’ll go on.

Berry was in two hit and run incidents in a three-year period, mind you this was pre-TMZ days where a simple nose pick made headlines.

You know hits and runs? Lindsay Lohan. You know who does it multiple times? Amanda Bynes, And what do we call them? Hazards to society.

Just because Berry got away with it in an era that wasn’t as celebrity obsessed or internet savvy doesn’t put her in any different of a category.

So, why can she not keep a man? Why will Martinez leave her in the next three years like clockwork? Welp, let me ask you a question: Would you stay?

 

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Comments

  1. Halle Fan says

    This article is dumb. You are totally speculating, no proof of anything. It would be really nice to read a positive, uplifting article about a celebrity. You know there is a saying, your words and actions are a reflection of you – not the person you are talking about. So, my question is, what does this article say about the person that wrote it? Hmmmm….

  2. Joanna says

    As much as I loved watching Miss Berry in her earlier career, I have to agree with your article and praised you for your courage for writing it. The fact that she always blamed her relationship failure on whoever she was dating or married to at the time in order to get sympathy, is a true sign of sociopathism and narcissism, let alone the chaos she is causing around her daughter. She seems to be more worried about how she may be perceived in the public eye by justifying her crazy behaviors and creating these images of her exes through not-so-clever PR stunt to make her look like the victim. What amaze me is of all the exes she had in the past, One could have really revealed who the “real” Halle Berry is but none ever did. To me that shows character in a man especially the father of her daughter who clearly got the worst of it and always seemed to have taking the high road despite her constant attacks. Furthermore none of her past exes ever played the media like she always did in order to balance her lies to tell the truth or their side of the story. There is something to be said about that. But even with the fascination of Halle Berry, it is a fact that, even with her crazy and destructive behaviors (and unrational hate for the father of her daughter), most common people would still be in “awe” when coming face to face with her. That is just human nature and is a sign of what our society is today. It isn’t about what your true personality that matters anymore for society, it is about how famous are you and how much gossip can one may get out of it. I think her time has come and gone and the last few years we’ve witness what “losing it” truly does to someone who’s insecure and can’t deal with real life issues. Sadly I do not believe we’ve seen the last of Halle Berry disturbing controlling behavior and the real loser in all of it, is her daughter. A person like Halle Berry will never realize the damages she cause this child because she will always attempt to justify herself by blaming someone else, in this case the Father, so she never have to accept what she did and face the consequence. I feel sorry for a woman like this and that’s the truth. Not because her PR team works overnight to make her shit smell like roses but because she’ll never realize how rotten she’s become.

  3. Ibah says

    Haha! Funny. When ALL of her relationships end, she publicly and relentlessly tried to malign the other party. Going on Oprah and such claiming that they were either abusive, cheating etc etc etc. It’s never her fault.

    Just thought I would correct though (don’t mind me!) that I don’t think her ex has “visitation”. He has shared equal legal custody, so that’s not really visitation.

  4. ebony lover says

    I see it from the neck down, but fom the neck up I just go soft. I dunno what it is. I mean, I love black girls normally, they do it for me in ways unlike my own skin colour. But I just don’t fancy her, sorry. Maybe that madness is what I subconsciously see in her face that turns me off so much.

  5. Kitty Glitter says

    I agree with a lot of this article but the part about the hotter a girl is the crazier they are I don’t find to be true. In her case I just don’t find her hot and that kind of thing is so subjective.

    There are cases where ugly girls get treated hot and becomes crazy bitches also. So in their mind they are hot even though they aren’t.

    That’s why any halfway decent looking girl on dating sites gets their inbox flooded. There are so many desperate guys out there with low standards that eventually all girls will think of themselves as God’s gift to men.

    I just find her a bland person and a terrible actress.

  6. Run says

    Halle Berry is a nasty, crazy tramp! Everyone around Hollywierd knows it. I wouldn’t bone her, I wouldn’t be her boyfriend, and I damn sure wouldn’t marry her. Moreover, she really isn’t all that pretty without makeup.

    Halle Berry is nothing more than a wierd, narcissistic, self-centered, arrogant, uneducated, talentless, spoiled slut Yeah, some guys you would never think have hit that have hit it!)! And that’s why her life is a toilet-swirl…and why she cannot, and will never keep a man.

    I don’t know if she’ll even be able to keep a daughter once Nahla grows up and learns all about mommy dearest.

  7. Bratt says

    Why? Anyone with any psy. Education knows she suffering from a huge case of narcissism. She does need to see a shrink and get help. What I don’t understand is why the courts are making aubrey go through all the psy. Testing and not her. He could get the kid if he did she’s not stable state of mind material. Plus, if I was his legal team I’d have him take a lie detector test.

  8. PutItIntoPerspective says

    I agree. Good points.

    Whenever people talk about any woman in Hollyweird being incomparably gorgeous, I roll my eyes. It’s subjective, folks. Yes, these women, including cray-cray Ms. Berry, are attractive. But they’re considered to be the hottest things in the world ONLY because they’re celebrities and have built up their personal “brands.” The minute the media starts saying so-and-so is beautiful/hot/amazing, the masses get brainwashed and automatically agree. Look at the way Halle’s been using and continues to use media manipulation to come out smelling like a rose. She’s had major issues for a long time, and at the rate she’s going, she’s going to do some real damage to that precious child of hers. But she shows up looking great and people buy into her fake, I’m-the-victim, I’m-so-innocent-and-sweet act.

    P.S. I’ve seen Halle up close. In casual gear, and with no makeup on, she’s cute, has nice skin, and is fit (and is much more petite than I’d expected). But she is nothing to write home about. My eyes didn’t fall out of my head, and my jaw didn’t drop. She’s as normal as the next girl.

    Well … on the outside, at least.

  9. Brad says

    Why men can’t keep Halle Berry? A question rarely asked because the agenda here, as usual, is only to JUDGE Ms. and Berry to have her take ownership of the behavior of men and the “crazy” that men bring to relationships. Folks hating Ms. Berry for whatever reasons will never improve the quality of your life.

  10. scott says

    I have told my male friends this for a long time. That girl is crazy, obsessive, and has a chip on her shoulder. Seems very controlling. I feel sorry for her daughter. The baby daddy should def try to get full custody because I think Halle is the next celeb to go koo-koo. She has definately scared a lot of men in Hollywood. Interview guys who have dated her. They will tell you privately that she is whack!

  11. True African says

    Oh so has everyone here who’s written a comment. We’ve all seen Halle Berry up close. Pssssht. That’s not the point.

    The point is that society shouldn’t encourage sociopathic behaviour by highlighting outer appearance. Afterall if outside appearances are what really matters then Halle is the best case study that that theory/conclusion is incorrect. Same goes for Eva Longoria, Kim Kardashian, Angelina Jolie and the list goes on…for people who come from failed relationships and are highly flawed but get away scott free with bad behaviour just because of their status!

    Americans are destroying their own society by focusing on the fluff instead of substance. Don’t watch those stupid reality shows and stupid housewives. They serve no purpose but to display their shallow lifestyles and spending habits. Pointless

  12. sandpearls says

    Finally! An accurate and hilarious read about Halle Berry’s character antics. So many points on the bullseye… An extremely beautiful woman, with money, acting talent up the gazoo – and yet not only can she never manage to find happiness in any of her relationships, but ALWAYS PR’s herself as a victim, indulging herself with the public’s sympathy. And now her exhibited hateful behavior toward Gabriel appears just ridiculously vicious – while the whole time complaining about the paparazzi, that she herself has brought on. Halle’s always seems to be angry when caught off guard (definitely a tell sign of control issues), and it shows not just in photos, but does she not realize that children pick up on that stuff. While her daughter is always smiling in photos with her father. Halle chooses her situations, including how she reacts to them in front of her child, and that bothers me the most about Halle – it’s always about “Halle” is all I’ve seen from her, even under the guise and accusations she is constantly throwing out, about protecting herself and child. Yet it was her new boyfriend that abused Gabriel – and she’s fine with that sort of abuse no doubt.

    This is one of the first articles I’ve read where it mentions Halle being “controlling” – thank you. I’ve always gotten that vibe with her, mostly based on a lot of manipulations she’s spun with her PR identity, etc, but also in how she addresses the public with so much restraint, that is when she not performing her words to them off screen. She’s a talented actress, so she pulls it off well. And her beauty also gets her free passes – I’m sure with many, including the general public. I use to really like her, but how she’s handled this whole divorce and custody thing, she doesn’t seem to demonstrate that she understands the impact this could be having on her child. Which of all people, Halle should know this, being her father was abusive (which she consistently has made public). No doubt this personal history of hers lends to her crazy behavior, while her fame feeds to her narcissism and power-playing (under the guise of victimization and safety of course). It’s boring already. And I agree with this article – they all wind up running from her.

  13. sandpearls says

    I thoroughly enjoyed reading your comment. Couldn’t agree with you more on your point re: Gabriel attempting to take the high road despite Halle’s mean-spirited attacks. From what I’ve seen the child is always smiling and happy in photos when she’s with her father, and so is he (speaking volumes about their positive father daughter relationship). I too find myself wondering how Halle’s angry and crazy behavior must be affecting her daughter. I would add, that not only does Halle have a track record of broken relationships, but moreover always blames the other party via some sort of victim scenario. Right now her daughter is young and adorable to love unconditionally, but it’s only a matter of time before her daughter gets older. I can only assume if Halle doesn’t get some serious counseling, she will treat her daughter in the same vain. And then Halle will be adding her daughter to that list of broken relationships too. Thank Goodness that little girl will have her father. For all we know, that maybe one of Gabriel’s concerns.

  14. Jessica says

    Um, Eric Benet did cheat on Halle and so did David Justice. Those are the only two individuals that I ever heard her specifically name publicly. She did indicate that there was a famous celebrity (which many speculate to be Wesley Snipes) that hit her and made her 80% deaf in one ear, but she never named him. So you think that the infidelity and physical abuse inflicted upon her was her fault? I’ve never heard her mention Michael Ealy, Shemar Moore, Danny Wood, etc. in any interviews.

    Everyone has issues and all of us are a work in progress and I’m sure that Halle’s issues have contributed to the demise of some, but not all of her relationships. I think her biggest problem is not being selective. It is obvious that she cannot be alone/without a man, which is a problem. You are wrong when you say that she does not acknowledge that she has flaws, she has admitted to picking the wrong men!

    Halle Berry is a gorgeous, intelligent, successful woman and she has said that some men see her as “Halle Berry, the movie star” and expect her to be perfect and live up to the pedestal that they have placed her on and are disappointed when she does not live up to the perfected image that they had of her (no one is perfect). I do believe this to be true and this obviously would serve as a hindrance towards obtaining/maintaining a lasting relationship.

    I do think that it is wrong that she has made her baby’s daddy out to be a villain because she wants her daughter all to herself. It seems as if she was more interested in having a sperm donor for her daughter than an actual father. It seems like she would be happy that her baby’s daddy wants to be there for their daughter especially since her father was not there for her.

  15. A Realist says

    @RUN, You wouldn’t “bone her”?? First of all, you would never get the chance because this goddess wouldn’t give you the time of time. Stop dreaming. Get a job.

  16. Ike Turner says

    Hey everybody, first black men were fighting her, now white men are fighting each other over her. She’s a drama queen and she’ll get somebody killed eventually.

  17. Joy says

    What is this? Attack Halle Holiday? Sure Halle has had problems and issues in life, as have all evolving human beings. Halle is in a comfortable place now and understands that these type comments are simply speculation around enquiring minds. The Bible states in Job chapter 4: verse 8 that People who plow evil and plant trouble, harvest it. Growth comes from focusing on our own dysfunctions and lessons; not from someone else’s.

  18. Mitesh says

    However, the fact she attributed it to that and made the irrational and, in my opinion, terrible decision to cut deliciousness out of her life entirely is more than enough evidence to prove she is DEFCON 1 kinda crazy…
    what a stupid article this is ..is proved by your above statement ..

    She didnt cut deliciousness out of her diet ..but her cut all the cruelty ,diseases and disgusting corpses of animals out of her life..her fresh look at 47 says it all ..
    Way to go ..Vegan Diet ..and vegan people ..meat sucks

  19. Wow says

    Tell me who is perfect, most people that grow up without a father, look for love in the wrong places. However this story sounds like a number of celebrities. Some people have to be in the company of another human being, this could be J-lo to Kim- K. So before you judge someone have all the facts!

  20. Steve says

    Just let Gabriel Aubrey see his daughter. Most women, upon leaving a relationship that involves children are subject to laws that limit where they can move with the child. In my case, I cannot move more than an hour and a half away from my ex’s residence. Fathers are so important in children’s lives. Little Nahla is lucky that her father wants so badly to be involved in her life. A lot of fathers don’t. He is equally entitled to be in her life as you are, and much more entitled to be in her life than Olivier Martinez. Just let him be a Dad, and don’t talk crap about him in front of your daughter.

  21. Mike says

    Why men can’t keep Halle? Well Halle Berry is a 46 year old beautiful women who has had access to some of the best available men on the market because of herstatus for the last 20 years and she have been involved in countless relationships. At what point do you continue to believe it’s everyone else and not yourself to why you’re single? At 46 it is Halle Berry and her new husband will understand why she was single soon enough, but there will be another sucker after him.

  22. WizzoPro says

    You are delusional! U know good and well that describes Halle to the TEE! As FINE as she is, she’s a freaking nut, PLAIN AND SIMPLE!

  23. Bob Gainey says

    Narcissistic crazies like Halle Berry these are way too much to handle. They are unpleasant and their make their partner’s lives miserable. I went out with a super hot and crazy N; a Cambodian Halle Berry. Life was hell with this insanely self-centred drama queen. She was an emotional vampire. I do not wish this type of woman on my worst enemy. Stay clear boyz!

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