Although Amy Winehouse faces personal and professional ruin after that video of her huffing crack got out, at she can sleep safe knowing that Mary J Blige is on the case.
Made aware of Amy Winehouse's plight by a shining crack-signal beamed into the sky, Mary J Blige has made it her business to help Winehouse out by hook or by crook, whatever it takes.
Or she just mentioned it in an interview because she's got an album coming out soon and she knows it's newsworthy. Guess which one it is, kids!
When Britney Spears had her crazy meltdown at the start of the month, Dr Phil was at hand to sort everything out. Sure, Dr Phil's credentials might not be up to the standard of a state-licensed psychiatrist, but he's shouted "Get real!" at rednecks multiple times on TV before and that's almost the same thing.
But Dr Phil isn't there for Amy Winehouse. Things are looking doomy for Amy, with her banged-up husband apparently seeking a divorce and a video of her smoking all the crack in the world getting investigated by the police and possibly putting the skids on her attempt to, ahem, 'crack' America, but in the absence of a television almost-psychiatrist, Amy Winehouse has got the next best thing rushing to help.
Mary J Blige.
Now, granted, Mary J Blige isn't so much a qualified psychiatrist as a self-obsessed woman who might be on steroids. And she's not so much rushing to help as using Amy Winehouse's predicament as a way to drum up sales for her new album. But she has dispensed advice to Jamie Lynn Spears before and that's almost the same thing.
Speaking to ITV about Amy Winehouse, Mary J Blige said:
“I have things to say to Amy Winehouse, loving things and things she will be able to relate to. But I don’t really think she can hear me right now, because when I was in a situation like she was in I couldn’t hear.”
OK, so Mary J Blige isn't going to help Amy Winehouse come off crack after all. But she would, so long as Amy Winehouse wasn't on crack. If she wasn't on crack then Mary would get her off crack in a second. But she is on crack, so Mary's probably just not going to bother.
Did we mention that Mary J Blige has an album out?
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euclid says
Much Obliged for the bilge pump.
Can’t we hook up the Whinehorse with PDoh?
Think of the endless fun and headlines!
p.s. I’m pretty sure PDoh is a zombie. Shhhh. It’s a secret.
It’s a Whinehorse race to the finish, and she’s losing. Hah!
Gemma Riley says
Hmm I think you’re being a bit harsh on Mary J. Blige. She did struggle with drug addictions in the past so of course she’s going to empathise with Amy Winehouse.