Articles tagged with: rehab
Steve-O might be stupid enough to staple his balls to his thigh night after night for fun and profit, but it turns out he's not that stupid. By which we mean that Steve-O is smart enough to plead guilty to cocaine possession after he filmed himself smashing up his neighbour's house on drugs and then blogged extensively about his battle to the same drugs. As a result of his guilty plea, it's been announced that Steve-O's only punishment for his March drug bust will be the rehab stint that he's already partially through. And now that he's clean, Steve-O knows that next time he staples his nuts to his leg it'll be out of genuine mental dysfunction or self-loathing rather than drug addiction. Three cheers!
Hey, everyone! Get ready for the hecklerspray word of the day.
Today’s word: depressed. Adjective.
1. Sad, gloomy; dejected; downcast.
2. Being or measured below the standard or norm.
3. The reason you say you went to rehab, but everyone probably knows you’re a bit of a drunkard because there’s always loads of pictures of you stumbling out of clubs and parties pretty trashed.
Now, try to apply the correct definition to the following statement: Kirsten Dunst has publicly announced that her recent trip to rehab was because she was depressed.
And yes, the correct answer is ‘all of the above’.
Not a single millisecond goes by when there isn't some astonishing new rumour about Amy Winehouse - that she's taken so many drugs she now sees only in kaleidoscope or that she's actually a half-human, half-horse hybrid genetically engineered on the planet Mediocrotron and sent to Earth to soundtrack dinner parties everywhere. The latest gossip flying around? That Amy is being shipped off to Barzilai Medical Centre, Israel - a fresh attempt to wean her off those lovely narcotics by plunging her into a $12,800 course of ''short, intensive and effective treatment". Presumably, involving a room full of people with actual real-life problems yelling "oh, just pull yourself together, you self-obsessed stupid bint".
For three years hecklerspray did nothing but sit out back and smoke rat skin with our 11 cats. Not the kind of smoking you're thinking though - we mean we literally smoked them like the skins of a rotisserie chicken. Our intent was to capture a cool smokey aroma in every meal those cats ever ate. It'd be an understatement if we said our efforts went unappreciated, except for Fluffy. He ate those skinned, savory rat skins by the dozen - he really couldn't stop himself. After a while he killed and smoked every rat within a 16 block radius. When they were all gone neighborhood babies began to disappear. Now we're not making any allegations here, but when we killed and smoked Fluffy cribs were just as full in the morning as they'd been the night before. We do mean literally there, though, about smoking Fluffy. We wrapped him in a hand towel and twisted it shut at both ends. Our lungs probably have an inch of litter box in them. It's because that cat pooped alot, it's the price he paid. Steven Tyler can relate to this very real tale of Fluffy's substance abuse. Well that's what his new rehab centre might tell us anyway.
Lindsay Lohan went to rehab last year, did you know that? Chances are you did, because that's all Lindsay Lohan ever sodding talks about.
And now, just for any latecomers who didn't know they even cared about it, Lindsay Lohan has started spouting off about her stints in rehab again.
Lindsay Lohan has told People that all her problems stemmed from putting herself in the wrong situations, and that she's changed her life as a result. Incidentally, Lindsay Lohan told People this at photo exhibition - so it's pleasing to see that she's swapped wrong situations for shit ones full of wankers with made-up names.
You've seen Lindsay Lohan's tits, now she wants you see her soul - but it's OK, because it's less alarmingly freckly.
That's right, Lindsay Lohan has done a magazine interview all about the impossible darkness of her last 12 months.
It's an important interview because it marks the first time that Lindsay Lohan has publicly prattled on about herself in, ooh, roughly about six or seven minutes. Plus she's kept her clothes on for this one, so your retinas aren't as likely to snap off and run for freedom this time.
We can't overstate how selfish Eva Mendes is being at the moment - what sort of self-respecting celebrity quietly goes off to rehab instead of having a massive teary public breakdown?
And what's more, it turns out that Eva Mendes has left rehab without immediately trying to validate her stay by combing over every single tiny personal blip she's ever experienced to a number of glossy magazines. The bitch!
However, Eva Mendes isn't through with rehab yet - reports suggest that she's only left temporarily. But that doesn't answer any of our questions, like why Eva Mendes was even in rehab to begin with, or how long her break from rehab will last or if agreeing to star in Ghost Rider was a direct consequence of being hammered on a shitload of drugs. These are the big questions, people.
You know the other day when people were all like 'Kirsten Dunst needs help' and Kirsten Dunst's people were all like 'Shut up, Kirsten Dunst is fine'?
Yeah, they're liars. Kirsten Dunst has reportedly checked into rehab in Utah and - best of all - it's been suggested that she was off her face on something or other when she did.
Now, it's too early to know what - if anything - Kirsten Dunst is addicted to so badly that she needs to attend rehab for it, but senior experts have ruled out toothpaste, dental floss, dental braces or anything to do with her whole dental region because, well, look at her.
