Lindsay Lohan is no longer an addict of anything. We’d speculated that she’d become addicted to ‘buttons of the chocolate’. Alas, no dice. She’s no longer an addict of anything remotely fun. Nor of anything illegal. Says her father, who’d never lie about that. Never!
Michael Lohan has been speaking to media outlets, who aren’t us, about his daughter’s progress following rehab. Lindsay spent the very end of last year in and out of the Betty Ford facility, withdrawing from her assorted ills.
She’d had dirty drug tests for amphetamines and cocaine in the recent past. However, she’s no longer failing tests and multi-tasking by thumbing her nose at the judge.
Michael, who’s never been estranged from his daughter and who never shills personal interest stories to further his own ‘career’, says his daughter has taken multiple drug tests, in the last few weeks, and has passed them all. Which would be something to get a little more excited about, had Lindsay not only just been released from rehab this month.
We’re not ones to piss in people’s Cornflakes (we prefer doing so in one’s Sugar Puffs). But it seems a little premature to be talking about her progress and how she’ll never again be caught licking her mum’s mixing bowl.
From Radar Online:
“Lindsay is doing four or five tests a week and she has passed all of them with flying colors,” Michael told Radar Online, in an interview. “She’s doing really great right now,” he added. “She is serious about staying healthy and is avoiding all the old things she used to do.”
Because giving one interview isn’t going to score him a People Magazine cover, Michael said the same thing to Hollyscoop.
“We went to an AA meeting last night then went home and had a quiet night,” Michael told Hollyscoop, at the Hospitality Suite at the Nivea For Men Mansion, hosted by Pascal Mouawad in celebration of the 68th Annual Golden Globe Awards on Saturday. “She changed back to the girl she used to be,” Michael told HS. “When she was at her best–literally. She’s done a 180 and I’m very proud of her.”
Copy and pasting in real life is fun, children. Even more fun than declaring an addict of some years clean, after what was really only weeks of treatment.
This was a guest post by Amy Grindhouse, so drop to your knees and avert your eyes you disgusting plebs because, obviously, she’s the best. Ever.
Eugene says
I don’t think it will last.
If Lindsay really is clean, and really isn’t going to be acting out anymore, then the coverage of her in the tabloids will cease (Good news is no news, right?).
And honestly, what else is she famous for? I can’t see her going back to doing bit parts in movies, and I doubt that any legit producer will give her a major role with her past reputation, and the difficulty of insuring her.
Thus, even if she is clean, I can see a relapse happening, if only because it’s the only way she will get attention — which is clearly what she craves.
Sad, really.