What do you do when you’ve got no discernible talent? Well, if you’re lucky enough to be deemed attractive enough or, indeed, considered to be someone with a vague something to lose after a sex tape, you can forge something of a career out of very little.
However, if you’re savvy enough, you’ll constantly remind everyone that you exist with a variety of non-events that keep gossip columnists from having to actually think of any articles to write.
And here lies the success of Kim Kardashian. She’s a one-woman PR machine, dedicated to simply existing, occasionally opening her mouth, playing the wounded card every other month and of course, babies and weddings. It’s the latter that’s the soup of the day.
America treated Kardashian’s wedding like it was their own version of the Royal Wedding. In many respects they were right to do so because neither party as any particular use. In Kimmy’s favour, at least she doesn’t cost the taxpayer any money.
Enough of that though. See, Kim needs us all to remember her. And as such, she got married eight weeks ago and now, it already seems like it’s over.
We did warn you about this. When you’ve got nothing to sell, all you can do is sell your feelings – real or otherwise. And so now, we’re dealing with cod-sorrow. No. She’s not been bullying fish, rather, her husband who we’ve never heard of – Kris Humphries – has been seen without his wedding ring on while carrying cardboard boxes.
A source close to the couple has told MailOnline:
“I don't know when they?ll announce the split or why they got married in the first place but they are done.”
“They are divorcing. Kim has been staying in a New York hotel which Kris has failed to visit.”
Other publications have stabbed in the dark, saying that Humphries has been partying without Kim, flirting with “multiple women” and “acting like a single man”.
MULTIPLE WOMEN. What a delicious phrase.
Next week, of course, there’ll be articles detailing that the pair COULDN’T BE HAPPIER and that they’re looking forward to STARTING A FAMILY.
This, of course, will no doubt see Kim pretending to lose the baby early in the pregnancy, giving her the chance to cry on a chat-show and the whole thing will stagger on until the scant few who cared tire to the point of complete apathy or, indeed, someone else comes along.
HURRAY FOR CELEBRITIES!
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David says
Perhaps the most despicable skank masquerading as a celebrity that has ever drawn a breath on planet Earth. If you want any evidence that America is a nation of idiots then look to the attention we’ve given to all the Kardashians. The only thing interesting about their show is watching how the two youngest members are turning into slut puppies just like their older sisters.
disgust says
This family really has a lot of shadey,deeply disturbing aspects. The father helped to free a double killer and also hid the bloody clothes because OJ was a celebrity. The daughter coming from a dirty past also put out and made money off of a tawdry and souless sex film,creepily empty even for porn,stole from this Ray J’s mother,used sexuality to further a pointless career that has strikingly no discernible talent,is part of this plastic ugly famewhoring clan,stole designs from true designers in clothes and jewelry,will go and do and brand anything including predatory cc’s for a buck…..You can not polish up a turd,and while Kim Kardashian tries to reinvent herself into the droning,lackluster slut with a new face, their stable of lawyers and pr sleazes like Joe Francis,Jonathan Cheban Rick / from Vivid adult film entertainment think they conjured up a real money making hoax on the American people. Btw,look at E’s Dirty Soap Nadia Bjorin if you want to see what pretty is.Maybe even dumb E realizes how disgusted people are with the Kartrashians and are covering their asses with new “talent.”