Actors, for the most part, shouldn’t ever be encouraged to sing. Think about the characterless renditions heard in Walk The Line. Have you even heard Bill Shatner singing ‘Mr Tambourine Man’? Have you?!
Well, the next thesp to make you wish humans had never evolved ears is Gwyneth Paltrow who is threatening to sing at next month’s Country Music Association Awards. It’s little wonder she’s having a go though, seeing as she’s not even the least tuneful adult in her house.
She’s married to Chris Martin from Coldplay. That was a joke about how he’s rubbish at singing.
Anyway, Paltrow is going to warble her way through the title track of her new movie Country Strong and will be joined by someone called Vince Gill who no-one has heard of… apart from dewy eyed, sentimental widowers who probably have cushions with Vince’s face printed on them.
Taylor Swift and Keith Urban are also set to perform at the ceremony, which takes place at Nashville’s Bridgestone Arena on 10th November and, to be perfectly honest, it might be worth filling your ear canals up with peanut butter, just in case you accidentally hear some of it.
This is all part of her delving into the world of country music as she stars in in Country Strong as a fallen country singer who tries to revive her career by going on tour.
Paltrow researched the history of country music when she accepted the role.
“I sort of started at the beginning with Hank [Williams] Sr. and Johnny Cash and really studied Dolly [Parton] and Loretta Lynn.
“I had never really known very much about country music, and I now am very into it. I know a lot more about it than I did.”
That’s research for you, y’tit!
Of course, Paltrow is going to do some more singing on television as she’s landed a guest role in Glee.
She’ll be playing a supply teacher who ends up falling for high school choir leader Will Schuester and his weirdly symmetrical face.
During her stint on the show, it is rumoured that she’ll perform three or four solo songs, which you’ll be able watch through your fingers next month.
‘Til then, listen to this bollocks.
Lisa says
Never has jamming hairpins into my ears been more appealing.
hoohaahee says
utter. shite.
The ego of these “stars” knows no bounds.
Jen says
Wow, that was a nasty article. She sounds better than some others that have been on that show recently. I hope you are wrong about 3 songs though.
Marie Thacker says
your site is not showing up correctly during my browser