It’s E3 this week in LA, and we have our intrepid reporter Dave over there covering everything in his periodic updates.
What this means is there’s little else going on in the gaming world and it’s hard for us to think of much else to cover.
So why not just go read Dave’s E3 columns for your fix on the breaking news and just to see him boasting about how he gets to go to LA for free like a massive, massive twerp.
Jealousy: our strong point. But read on for things we’ve been trying to think about this week while we avoid the thought of E3. Namely: why summer is stupid and ruins gaming, why Demon’s Souls is stupid and ruins gaming and why the recession is stupid and ruins gaming.
See, while the peons among us have to stay back in sunny old Blighty, we still have to entertain ourselves. The thing is, we’re experiencing a nice spate of weather – a huge rarity – and we are expected to leave the house and sit in the sunshine.
This is a Very Bad Thing. Why? A few reasons.
Idiots come out when it’s sunny – you know the type: shaven-headed, not wearing shirts, usually with either violent-looking dogs or mini-scooters. Sun + plants = hayfever, which ruins many lives each year. The sun shines too bright and means you can’t see the screen properly, should you actually manage to get some gaming time. And finally, and most importantly, leaving the house means you don’t get to play games any more.
All of these elements combine to make for grumpy gamers. We like our pale skin, our lack of social skills and we like making progress in games. See this handsome writer’s column from exactly one year ago for proof.
Which leads nicely into the next point, about From Software’s Demon’s Souls and the progress made in it. Or lack thereof, should we say.
See, these rare occasions when we’ve been able to stay indoors when we really should be outside being sociable, playing extreme Frisbee and drinking cider, we’ve been playing on one of the hardest games to come out in recent times. And it really lives up to that tag.
When it finally comes out over here, if it does at any point (US release confirmed!), you’ll see. Not that anyone bar the arrogant, knowledgeable ones (hello!) will buy it.
And why is the recession stupid? Because it means we have no money, and when we have no money the last thing we want to do is buy loads of games. So why do the likes of Steam and Good Old Games insist on reducing prices to obnoxiously low levels, thus encouraging us to spend our money for essentials on the likes of Duke Nukem 3D and Freedom Force?
Bastards.
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