Remember when Arnold Schwarzenegger said that he hadn’t been having an affair with a woman called Gigi? Remember that? Well, while that may be true, he didn’t get around to mentioning that he did put his steroid shrivelled chap inside one of his staff.
Better yet is that good ol’ Arnie managed to do it without a condom on and then promptly watched said staffer balloon up over a period of 9 months until a baby came out.
He knew about all this while he was preaching about Prop8 and other emotive subjects, taking a moral highground, during his stint as California Governor, which is nice. It would appear that Arnie waited ’til he’d quit office to tell his wife, Maria Shriver, who promptly left him and started thinking about their relationship in terms of financial figure no doubt.
Schwarzenegger told the LA Times, who invariably couldn’t believe their luck:
“After leaving the governor’s office I told my wife about this event, which occurred over a decade ago.”
“I understand and deserve the feelings of anger and disappointment among my friends and family. There are no excuses and I take full responsibility for the hurt I have caused. I have apologized to Maria, my children and my family. I am truly sorry.
Sadly for Schwarzenegger, he’s got a really, really funny voice which ensures that any apologies – heartfelt or otherwise – sound hilarious.
Of course, this is a lovely way for Arnold to treat his wife who stood by her husband throughout is political stint, managing to grin through the constant accusations that he had a history of groping women.
Don’t remember that? There were loads of allegations of sexual misconduct from several women, six of whom spoke out about Arnold’s wandering hands. It seems that Arnie likes to paw at women’s breasts the most, with others complaining that he’d stuck his giant sausage hands up a lady’s skirt, with another saying that he tried to take off her bathing suit in an elevator without asking.
Bizarrely, Arnold even settled out-of-court with repugnant British television personality Anna Richardson (she’s responsible for bringing Gillian McKeith to our screens, alongside various hysterical ‘OUR CHILDREN ARE TURNING INTO PERVS!’ type shows) after another boob grope. That’s where she got those expensive looking teeth then?
Either way, Schwarzenegger is now a single man and free to roam the world with a mucky look in his eyes. Women, lock yourselves under the stairs now or stock up on cattle prods and stun-guns.
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Sarah says
Arnold is not single, you big dope.
LemonMeister, Los Angeles, CA says
No wonder he never responded to any of the certified letters I sent regarding new homebuilders? http://www.akbhomesucks.com My Home My Lemon a KB Home Sucks. He must have been listening to…LED ZEPPELIN – THE LEMON SONG LYRICS bring home my money, you take my money, give it to another man. I should have quit you, baby-a, oh, such a long time ago-ho. down on this killin’ floor. squeeze, squeeze me, baby, until the juice runs down my leg, The way you squeeze my lemon-a
I’m stuck with my Lemon thanks to an inactive Government in California, the whole time the Governor is getting his Lemons squeezed on the taxpayers dime. Who’s getting “f”ed here? More power to you Arnie!
–LemonMeister–
ASHLEY says
Is anybody else devastated that this little piece of scum is about to have a life $100M X better than yours??? I HOPE THIS LITTLE PIECE OF SCUM GETS SUCH A BRAIN TUMOR, GETS RUN OVER BY A TRUCK, OR FREIGHT TRAIN!! GOD TAKE THAT LITTLE SCUM!!!