Now that Arnold Schwarzenegger has turned his back on politics and therefore, the people of America who made him so nauseatingly wealthy, he’s only gone and spat in the open wound by deciding that he doesn’t love his wife anymore.
Of course, this leaves Arnie wide open to accusations of being a ghoulish, hateful man. And so, this weekend, he decided that he should let us all know that he’s a really good guy by hanging around with his children while photographers followed him around.
Sadly for the flaccid muscle man, the assembled snappers all shouted ‘HEY! ARNOLD! WHAT’S ALL THIS WE HEAR ABOUT YOU HAVING SEX WITH SOMEONE CALLED GIGI GOYETTE WHILE YOU WERE STILL MARRIED?’
You heard that right. There’s rumours circulating that the p?t? brained hunk of Austrian simpletonry has been caught messin’ where he shouldn’t-a-been messin’ while he was still married to his wife Maria Shriver.
It goes without saying that Conan The Barbarian denies having an affair with Gigi Goyette, despite the fact the lady in question has got one of the most fun names in Hollywood. Just imagine Arnie saying it.
Gigi has a very, very different slant on the whole thing saying that:
?There were so many other women. About 13 have come out of the woodwork.?
This isn’t the first time Arnie has been linked to Goyette. The first time people started to speculate that they might be knocking their uglies together was way back in 2001.
Oddly, Arnie’s son has come out to talk about the split between his folks, tweeting:
‘Small speed bump in life, luckily we own hummers, we will cruise right over it.’
Cruising, of course, is slang for someone looking for sex. Well done to Patrick Schwarzenegger there, for that lame joke for us to end on.
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