Think of some of the greatest jobs in the world from a purely money-making perspective and ‘Amy Winehouse’s drug dealer’ is sure to pop up near the top of the list.
Maybe it would drop below the ranking of something like ‘supermodel massage artist who earns £500 a minute and is in constant demand’ or a hecklerspray employee, but all in all it’s a role that you certainly wouldn’t sniff at.
Though there would surely be some form of sniffing involved. And general inhaling. And breaking down of constituent ingredients into something more easily absorbed into the bloodstream. You get the idea.
But alas, for two people have been arrested on charges of being the beehived crooner’s personal suppliers. The licence to print money may be no more, it would seem.
Shock of all shocks, the news of the alleged dealers being arrested can be tracked back to the infamous video that everyone in the world knows far too much about – even the ones that don’t give two piece of caked-up shit.
The same video that everyone in the world wasn’t shocked about, nor did they care about. But it turns out that the police do care about it – not enough to charge young Amy, seemingly (though what they could do her for is up for debate) – but enough to track down the vagabonds that provided Winehouse with the naughty non-prescription drugs.
So it came to be that two (alleged) bad dudes, allegedly named John Blagrove and Cara Burton, have been charged with conspiracy to supply cocaine and MDMA (that’s as in Ecstasy and not a new, fashionable band, allegedly).
The alleged pair are allegedly set to have a court date at some point, alledgely meaning even more people that Amy allegedly knows could end up in the clink. If their alleged crimes end up being more than just allegations.
Which would mean that Amy Winehouse would be alone in the free world, save for… *shudder*… Pete fucking Doherty. Though there is always hope that someone will take incarcerated hubby Blake Fielder-Civil up on his offer and twot the whiny smackhead.
Which would leave Amy free to… we don’t know… have a music career again?
It would certainly be a novelty. Allegedly.