However, Amy Winehouse has received a rare nugget of good news today – police have confirmed that Amy won’t be charged for that video of her apparently smoking crack like it’s going out of fashion.
What fantastic news! Now that this crack video palaver is out of her hair, all Amy Winehouse has to do is sort out her crumbling marriage, her multimillion-pound divorce, her drug addiction, her self-harming tendencies, her skin disease and literally single other thing regarding her personal and professional life and she’ll be almost completely back on track. Go Amy!
Nobody can really know what it’s like to be Amy Winehouse. That’s because to be like Amy Winehouse you have to be off your munch on crack most of the time, and if that’s the case you’re probably worrying too much about the heart attack you think you’re going to have to stop and think “Ooh, this must be what it’s like to be Amy Winehouse.”
But, hey, that’s just speculation. For all we know Amy Winehouse has never taken crack in her entire life. Yes, she’s taken cocaine, heroin, Ecstasy and ketamine to the point of a near-death overdose, but we can’t say for sure if she’s ever taken crack.
Yes, we know that The Sun secretly filmed Amy Winehouse smoking a crack pipe, and that as soon as the video was released Amy Winehouse checked into a crack clinic and that Amy Winehouse was recently arrested for smoking crack in that video of her smoking crack, but where’s the proof, eh?
There isn’t any. And that’s why the police have just let Amy Winehouse go without charge, as BBC News reports:
Singer Amy Winehouse will not face charges over a video that purported to show her smoking a crack cocaine pipe, police have confirmed. She was interviewed under caution by police in east London after the footage was posted online in January. “The Crown Prosecution Service has now reviewed the case and no further action is being taken,” a Metropolitan Police spokesperson said. “Amy is pleased to be able to move on,” her spokesman said.
Let’s hope this close shave with the law has helped teach Amy Winehouse a valuable lesson – next time anyone films her huffing frantically on a crack pipe, she should make sure that the video will only get sent to You’ve Been Framed and nowhere else. After all, if it’s shown on TV she’ll get £250, and that can buy you a lot of crack these days.
Yeah, allegedly. Whatever.