Let's face it, we could all do with a bit more sex.
It's a beautiful thing – even if it is a quick knee-trembler around the back of the bar with that ugly girl/ guy from accounts. But sometimes getting your partner in the mood for a bit of loving can be difficult. Sometimes they are just too tired. There's never enough alcohol or Rohypnol when you need it.
Well, hecklerspray understands your pain, so we have come up with a list of films guaranteed to get them hornier than a dog with two cocks…
7. Secretary (2002)
Boss James Spader punishes his secretary Maggie Gyllenhaal's typos by giving her a good spank over his desk. We're just glad that rule has never been enforced at Hecklerspray Towers.
6. Bound (1996)
Wondered what the Wachowski brothers did before they did The Matrix? They made crime thrillers about two red-hot women (Jennifer Tilly and Gina Gershon) enjoying a steamy lesbian love affair while attempting to rip off the Mafia. The brothers even hired a 'sex consultant' to help with the lovemaking scenes. It certainly did the trick.
5. To Catch a Thief (1955)
Cary Grant and Grace Kelly swap sexual innuendos in Hitchcock's superb 1955 film.
4. Betty Blue (1986)
Beatrice Dalle became an overnight sensation and the favourite pin-up of many a university undergraduate after this stunning debut. Spotted by director Jean-Jacques Beineix walking down the street, Dalle is simply sensational as the beautiful but wild Betty. You know you are in for a treat from the opening scene.
3. Stealing Beauty (1996)
Liv Tyler goes to Italy after her mother commits suicide and pops her cherry in this steamy coming-of-age movie by Italian helmer Beranando Bertolucci. Granted, it does disappear up its own arse in some places, but the build-up to the scene when she loses her virginity is a masterclass in sexual tension. See, now we've disappeared up our own arse. Bloody Europeans.
2. And God Created Woman (1956)
Brigitte Bardot became an international sex symbol after this superb performance. The very definition of a sex kitten.
1. Dangerous Liaisons (1988)
Heaving bosoms apart, Dangerous Liaisons proves brain is the biggest sexual organ of them all.
Miss Cellania says
May I assume that, in order for this scheme to work, that you must find someone to watch these movies WITH? That’s the hard part!
gir says
There’s only so much the internet can do, Miss.
David Schwartz says
Alas, it always is.
carmela says
ive never seen any of these.
this explains alot….
johnny says
http://north-buffalo.myminicity.com/ind
Gospadin says
I can watch these films just fine by myself, thank you, and still have sex because I know when I’m in the mood.
Maria says
I haven’t seen these films and i had sex so i don’t see the point of this top 7.
gir says
HEY I’M A GIRL AND I HAD SEX!! THE SEXY SEX STUFF!!! WITH MY BUTT AND BOOBS ALL HANGIN OUT AND STUFF!! A GIRL! ME!!!!!!!!!
monster munch says
i think these responses prove that nobody on the internet gets laid.
except me.
gir says
Apparently you’ve never heard of “cybering”. I’m like the Gene Simmons of the internet except my sex video is a chat log.
Current Mood – Indifferent
Current Music – Foreigner, “I Wanna Know What Love Is”
mst3kster says
Hey, I have sex all the time. Frankly, it’s too much sex – way too much.
I mean, my hand won’t stop cramping.