It’s time to congratulate Madonna. And not because she only got up to pee 17 times last night – although that is her personal best this year.
Instead Madonna appears to have defied international adoption law and all number of child trafficking protesters by winning her appeal to adopt little Mercy James, the orphan that she couldn’t have a few months ago.
It’s unknown how Madonna convinced the judges to allow the adoption since, when asked, their voices were muffled by the sumptuous collar of their new fur coat and drowned out by the roar of their gleaming speedboat respectively.