What better way to cheer yourselves up in these times of economic strife than through the knowledge that something you have nothing to do with, nor could ever hope of having anything to do with, has made a crapload of money?
There is no better way, as Harry Potter and the Half Order of the Philosopher’s Hallows has shown us all by raking in more than $100 million in its first day on release.
Puts you in the perfect mood for a weekend, doesn’t it paupers!
But can Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince (Ha! We do know what it’s called!) possibly rake in even more cash to make you feel even more inadequate?
Yes. That’s a stupid question.
What Potter and co. have also proved is that the unassailable Dark Knight is actually pretty assailable. While last year we all thought it would be the biggest film ever, ever, ever and make all the money in the world, we were wrong.
We forgot the market for children and adults who like to read children’s books (must… resist… urge… to… say… “idiots”…) is pretty bloody massive.
The film has proven to be something of an unexpected hit, dealing as it does with themes of abandonment and the loss of innocence, even going so far as to involve some sex trafficking…
Alright, so that’s a lie – what do you expect us to say? It’s another Harry Potter film, and once again it’s made a hell of a lot of money like everyone always knew it would. Even Daniel Radcliffe’s cock couldn’t stop it from making all the money people have left to give.
Warner Brothers studio president, Alan Horn, let this revelation slip to the BBC:
“We owe this record-breaking opening to the remarkable fans who have stood by us and who stood in line to be among the first to see Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince.”
Which must fill fans with confidence, knowing that the head of the studio has been able to make the link between people paying to see his movie and the incredible amount of money that comes their way – and therefore the ability to continue with the franchise.
It’s almost enough to make you think those in charge aren’t as dumb as they look, sound and probably smell.